How to confess in church for the first time - examples of what to say to the priest. How to confess correctly and what to say to the priest: a specific example
archim.Preparation for Confession- test of conscience before.
Unlike a magical rite of purification, which allows for blind execution of the instructions of a “sacred” sorcerer or magician, the Sacrament of Repentance implies the presence of faith, awareness of personal guilt before God and others, and a sincere and conscious desire to free oneself from the power of sin.
The Sacrament of Repentance cannot be approached mechanically. Forgiveness and remission of sins is not a legal act of declaring a sinner innocent. Everyone who has gone to confession at least once in their life could pay attention to what prayer is being read over them: “reconcile and unite the saints of your Church.” Through the Sacrament of Repentance, a person is reconciled with, restores himself as a member.
Repentance for sin consists of 3 stages: Repent of the sin as soon as you have committed it; remember him at the end of the day and again ask God for forgiveness for him; confess it in the Sacrament of Repentance (Confession) and receive permission from this sin.
It is necessary to distinguish from the Sacrament of Penance:
- confidential spiritual conversation with a priest;
- a repentant conversation before (not mandatory).
Where and when can I go to confession?
You can confess anywhere on any day of the year, but it is generally accepted to confess at a scheduled time or by agreement with. The person confessing must be baptized.
It is better not to come to your first confession or confession after a long break on Sundays or days of great church holidays, when churches are full of people praying and there is a long line for confession. It is also advisable to come to the Sacrament in advance.
The First Confession should not be combined with the First Communion in order to fully experience the impressions of this great event in our lives. However, this is only advice.
How to prepare for Confession?
When preparing for confession, unlike preparation for the Sacrament of Communion, the church charter does not require any special or special prayer rules.
Before going to confession it is appropriate:
— Focus on prayers of repentance.
- Carefully examine thoughts, thoughts, deeds; note, if possible, all your sinful traits (as an auxiliary aid, also include those accusations that came from relatives, friends, and other people).
— If possible, ask for forgiveness from those who were offended by sin, offended by inattention, indifference.
— Consider the plan for confession, and, if necessary, prepare questions for the priest.
— In case of serious sins or rare confessions, additional fasting may be recommended.
— Sins are confessed from the moment of the last confession; if they have never been confessed, then from the moment of Baptism.
— In the Sacrament, all sins are forgiven, with the exception of those intentionally hidden. If you forgot to name some minor sin, then don’t worry. The sacrament is called the Sacrament Repentance, but not " The sacrament of listing all sins committed".
- You need to confess first of all what you are ashamed of! Tactically, confession should always be very substantive and specific. You can’t repent of being “proud”—it’s pointless. Because after your repentance, nothing changes in our lives. We can repent of having looked arrogantly or said some words of condemnation to a specific person. Because, having repented of this, next time we will think whether it is worth doing this. You cannot repent “in general,” in the abstract. A substantive confession allows you to simultaneously draw up a plan to combat certain passions. At the same time, pettiness should be avoided; there is no need to list a large number of sins of one type.
— Do not use crafty generalizations. For example, under the phrase treated one's neighbor unfairly can be understood as both involuntary grief and murder.
— There is no need to describe sexual sins in detail, it is enough to name them. For example: sinned (,).
— When preparing for and during Confession, self-justification should be avoided.
— If you do not feel your sins, it is recommended to turn to God with “ Lord, grant me to see my sins».
Is it possible to write down sins so as not to forget them at confession?
What to do if you do not consider yourself a sinful person? Or if the sins are common, like everyone else’s.
You should compare yourself first of all with, then your own spiritual health will not look so rosy.
A clear conscience is a sign of a short memory...
Is it worth confessing if you are likely to commit some sins again?
Is it worth washing if you know for sure that you will get dirty again? Repentance is a desire to be reborn, it does not begin with confession and does not end with it, it is a matter of a lifetime. Repentance is not only a listing of sins before the testimony of a priest, it is a state of hating sin and avoiding it.
Repentance should not just be an emotional release, it should be a systematic, meaningful work on oneself, with the goal of becoming closer to God in one’s qualities, becoming like Him in . Orthodoxy has an inexhaustible ascetic heritage, compiled by holy ascetics, which must be studied for proper organization.
Our goal is not just to be cleansed of sins and passions, but to acquire. It’s not enough, for example, to stop stealing, you need to learn mercy.
Gross sins have already been overcome and at each confession one has to repeat almost the same sins. How to get out of this vicious circle?
Bishop Tikhon (Shevkunov): “For people who have been churched for a long time, the “list” of sins, as a rule, is approximately the same from confession to confession. There may be a feeling of some kind of formal spiritual life. But at home we often sweep the floor, and, thank God, we don’t have to rake out the Augean stables every time. This is just not a problem. The trouble is that you begin to notice how the lives of some Christians become more and more boring over the years. But it should be the other way around: it should become more and more rich and more and more joyful.”
However, you don’t need to be complacent about the fact that you can’t overcome all sins; you just need to realize that not all sins and passions can be overcome instantly. This is a systemic problem, the solution of which is .
I have very difficult life circumstances, I’m afraid that a simple priest will not understand me.
The Lord will understand in any case. There is a good story about this: .
God wanted us to repent not before the sinless Angels, but before people. We should be ashamed of committing sin, not repenting. If a person sincerely hated his sins, then he will not be ashamed to confess them to the priest.
Sometimes you can notice that some parishioners, with amazing pedantry and scrupulousness confessing to the slightest violations of church rules or disrespect for sacred things, with the same amazing constancy remain rather harsh and unpeaceful in their relations with the people around them.
Priest Philip
Once in our lives we receive Baptism and are anointed with Chrism. Ideally, we get married once. The Sacrament of the Priesthood is not all-encompassing; it is performed only on those whom the Lord has destined to be accepted into the clergy. In the Sacrament of Unction our participation is very small. But the Sacraments of Confession and Communion lead us through our entire lives to eternity, without them the existence of a Christian is unthinkable. We get to them time after time. So sooner or later we still have the opportunity to think: are we preparing for them correctly? And understand: no, most likely not entirely. Therefore, talking about these Sacraments seems very important to us. In this issue, in a conversation with the editor-in-chief of the magazine, Abbot Nektariy (Morozov), we decided to touch upon confession (because covering everything is an impossible task, too “boundless” a topic), and next time we will talk about Communion of the Holy Mysteries.
“I guess, or rather, I guess: nine out of ten who come to confession don’t know how to confess...
- Indeed, it is so. Even people who regularly go to church do not know how to do many things in it, but the worst thing is with confession. Very rarely does a parishioner confess correctly. You have to learn to confess. Of course, it would be better if an experienced confessor, a man of high spiritual life, spoke about the Sacrament of Confession and repentance. If I decide to talk about this here, it’s simply as a person who confesses, on the one hand, and on the other, as a priest who quite often has to accept confession. I will try to summarize my observations of my own soul and how others participate in the Sacrament of Repentance. But by no means do I consider my observations sufficient.
— Let's talk about the most common misconceptions, misconceptions and mistakes. A person goes to confession for the first time; he heard that before receiving communion, one must confess. And that in confession you need to tell your sins. He immediately has a question: for what period should he “report”? Over your entire life, starting from childhood? But can you retell all this? Or do you not need to retell everything, but just say: “In childhood and youth I showed selfishness many times” or “In my youth I was very proud and vain, and even now, in fact, I remain the same”?
— If a person comes to confession for the first time, it is quite obvious that he needs to confess for his entire past life. Starting from the age when he could already distinguish good from evil - and until the moment he finally decided to confess.
How can you tell your whole life in a short time? In confession, we do not tell our whole life, but what is sin. Sins are specific events. However, there is no need to recount all the times when you sinned with anger, for example, or with lies. You must say that you committed this sin, and cite some of the brightest, most terrible manifestations of this sin - those that truly hurt your soul. There is one more pointer: what do you least want to tell about yourself? This is exactly what needs to be said first. If you are going to confession for the first time, it is best for you to set yourself the task of confessing your heaviest, most painful sins. Then the confession will become more complete, deeper. The first confession cannot be like this - for several reasons: this and psychological barrier(coming for the first time and in front of a priest, that is, in front of a witness, telling God about your sins is not easy) and other obstacles. A person does not always understand what sin is. Unfortunately, not even all people living church life know and understand the Gospel well. And except in the Gospel, the answer to the question of what is sin and what is virtue, perhaps, will not be found anywhere. In the life around us, many sins have become commonplace... But even when reading the Gospel to a person, his sins are not immediately revealed, they are gradually revealed by the grace of God. Reverend Peter Damascene says that the beginning of the health of the soul is seeing one’s sins as countless as the sand of the sea. If the Lord had immediately revealed to a person his sinfulness in all its horror, not a single person could have endured it. That is why the Lord reveals his sins to a person gradually. This can be compared to peeling an onion - first they removed one skin, then the second - and finally they got to the onion itself. That is why it very often happens: a person goes to church, regularly confesses, takes communion - and finally realizes the need for the so-called general confession. It very rarely happens that a person is ready for it right away.
- What it is? How does general confession differ from ordinary confession?
— General confession, as a rule, is called confession for the entire life lived, and in a certain sense this is true. But a confession that is not so comprehensive can also be called general. We repent of our sins from week to week, from month to month, this is a simple confession. But from time to time you need to give yourself a general confession - a review of your entire life. Not the one that was lived, but the one that is now. We see that we repeat the same sins, and we cannot get rid of them - that’s why we need to understand ourselves. Review your entire life as it is now.
— How to treat the so-called questionnaires for general confession? They can be seen in church shops.
— If by general confession we mean precisely confession for the entire life lived, then here there really is a need for some kind of external aid. The best guide for confessors - this is the book of Archimandrite John (Krestyankin) “The Experience of Constructing a Confession”, it is about the spirit, in the right mood a repentant person, about what exactly needs to be repented. There is a book “Sin and Repentance of the Last Times. About the secret ailments of the soul" by Archimandrite Lazar (Abashidze). Useful excerpts from St. Ignatius (Brianchaninov) - “To help the penitent.” As for the questionnaires - yes, there are confessors, there are priests who do not approve of these questionnaires. They say that you can read in them such sins that the reader has never even heard of, but if he reads it, he will be harmed... But, unfortunately, there are almost no such sins left that modern man I wouldn't know. Yes, there are questions there that are stupid, rude, there are questions that are clearly sinning with excessive physiology... But if you treat the questionnaire as a working tool, like a plow with which you need to plow yourself all over once, then, I think, you can use it. In the old days, such questionnaires were called “renewal,” which is so wonderful to modern ears. Indeed, with their help, man renewed himself as the image of God, just as an old, dilapidated and grimy icon is renewed. There is no need to think about whether these questionnaires are in good or bad literary form. The serious shortcomings of some questionnaires include this: the compilers include in them something that, in essence, is not a sin. Didn’t you wash your hands with scented soap, for example, or didn’t you do your laundry on Sunday... If you did the laundry during Sunday service, that’s a sin, but if you did the laundry after the service because there was no other time, I personally don’t see it as a sin.
“Unfortunately, you can sometimes buy this in our church shops...
- This is why it is necessary to consult a priest before using the questionnaire. I can recommend the book by Priest Alexy Moroz “I Confess Sin, Father” - it is a reasonable and very detailed questionnaire.
— Here it is necessary to clarify: what do we mean by the word “sin”? Most of those who confess, when they pronounce this word, mean a sinful act. That is, in essence, a manifestation of sin. For example: “Yesterday I was harsh and cruel to my mother.” But this is not a separate, not some random episode, this is a manifestation of the sin of dislike, intolerance, unforgiveness, selfishness. This means that you shouldn’t say that, not “yesterday I was cruel,” but simply “I’m cruel, there’s little love in me.” Or how should I say it?
— Sin is a manifestation of passion in action. We must repent of specific sins. Not in passions as such, because passions are always the same, you can write one confession to yourself for the rest of your life, but in those sins that were committed from confession to confession. Confession is the Sacrament that gives us the opportunity to start a new life. We repented of our sins, and from that moment our life began anew. This is the miracle that takes place in the Sacrament of Confession. That is why you always need to repent - in the past tense. You shouldn’t say: “I offend my neighbors,” I should say: “I offended my neighbors.” Because I have the intention, having said this, not to offend people in the future.Each sin in confession should be named so that it is clear what exactly it is. If we repent of idle talk, we do not need to retell all the episodes of our idle talk and repeat all our idle words. But if in some case there was so much idle talk that we tired someone with it or said something completely unnecessary, we probably need to talk about this in confession in a little more detail, more definitely. There are such words from the Gospel: For every idle word that people speak, they will give an answer on the day of judgment (Matthew 12:36). You need to look at your confession in advance from this point of view - whether there will be idle talk in it.
- And yet about passions. If I feel irritated by my neighbor’s request, but I don’t show this irritation in any way and provide him with the necessary help, should I repent of the irritation I experienced as a sin?
- If you, feeling this irritation within yourself, consciously fought against it - this is one situation. If you accepted this irritation of yours, developed it in yourself, reveled in it - this is a different situation. Everything depends on the direction of a person's will. If a person, experiencing a sinful passion, turns to God and says: “Lord, I don’t want this and I don’t want it, help me get rid of it,” there is practically no sin on the person. There is sin - to the extent that our heart participated in these tempting desires. And how much we allowed him to participate in this.
— Apparently, we need to dwell on the “disease of telling,” which stems from a certain cowardice during confession. For example, instead of saying “I behaved selfishly,” I begin to tell: “At work... my colleague says... and in response I say...”, etc. I eventually report my sin, but - just like that, within the frame of the story. This is not even a frame, these stories play, if you look at it, the role of clothing - we dress in words, in the plot, so as not to feel naked in confession.
- Indeed, it’s easier this way. But you don’t need to make it easy for yourself to confess. Confession should not contain unnecessary details. There shouldn't be any other people with their actions. Because when we talk about other people, we most often justify ourselves at the expense of these people. We also make excuses due to some of our circumstances. On the other hand, sometimes the extent of the sin depends on the circumstances of the sin. Beating a person out of drunken anger is one thing, stopping a criminal while protecting the victim is quite another. To refuse to help one's neighbor because of laziness and selfishness is one thing, to refuse because the temperature that day was forty is another. If a person who knows how to confess confesses in detail, it is easier for the priest to see what is happening to this person and why. Thus, the circumstances of the sin need to be reported only if the sin you committed is not clear without these circumstances. This is also learned through experience.
Excessive telling during confession may also have another reason: a person’s need for participation, spiritual help and warmth. Here, perhaps, a conversation with a priest is appropriate, but it should be at a different time, certainly not at the time of confession. Confession is a Sacrament, not a conversation.
— Priest Alexander Elchaninov, in one of his entries, thanks God for helping him every time experience confession as a catastrophe. What should we do to ensure that our confession, at least, is not dry, cold, formal?
“We must remember that the confession that we say in church is the tip of the iceberg. If this confession is everything, and everything is limited to it, we can say that we have nothing. There was no actual confession. There is only the grace of God, which, despite our foolishness and recklessness, still acts. We have the intention to repent, but it is formal, it is dry and lifeless. It’s like that fig tree, which if it bears any fruit, it will be with great difficulty.Our confession is performed at another time and prepared at another time. When we, knowing that tomorrow we will go to church, confess, sit down and sort out our lives. When I think: why have I judged people so many times during this time? But because, judging them, I myself look better in my own eyes. Instead of dealing with my own sins, I condemn others and justify myself. Or I find some kind of pleasure in condemnation. When I understand that as long as I judge others, I will not have the grace of God. And when I say: “Lord, help me, otherwise, how long will I kill my soul with this?” After this, I will come to confession and say: “I condemned people countless times, I exalted myself over them, I found sweetness in this for myself.” My repentance lies not only in the fact that I said it, but in the fact that I decided not to do it again. When a person repents in this way, he receives very great grace-filled consolation from confession and confesses in a completely different way. Repentance is a change in a person. If no change occurred, confession remained to a certain extent a formality. “Fulfillment of Christian duty,” as for some reason it was customary to express it before the revolution.
There are examples of saints who brought repentance to God in their hearts, changed their lives, and the Lord accepted this repentance, although there was no stole over them, and the prayer for the remission of sins was not read. But there was repentance! But with us it’s different - the prayer is read, and the person receives communion, but repentance as such has not occurred, there is no break in the chain of sinful life.
There are people who come to confession and, having already stood in front of the lectern with the cross and the Gospel, begin to remember what they sinned. This is always a real torment - both for the priest, and for those who are waiting for their turn, and for the man himself, of course. How to prepare for confession? Firstly, an attentive, sober life. Secondly - there is good rule, in place of which you can’t think of anything: every day in the evening, devote five to ten minutes not even to thinking about what happened during the day, but to repentance before God for what a person considers himself to have sinned. Sit down and mentally go through the day - from the morning hours to the evening hours. And realize every sin for yourself. A big sin or a small one - you need to understand it, feel it and, as Anthony the Great says, put it between yourself and God. See it as an obstacle between yourself and the Creator. Feel this terrible metaphysical essence of sin. And for every sin ask God for forgiveness. And put in your heart the desire to leave these sins in the past. It is advisable to write down these sins in some kind of notebook. This helps to put a limit on sin. We did not write down this sin, we did not do such a purely mechanical action, and it “passed on” to the next day. And then it will be easier to prepare for confession. There is no need to “suddenly” remember everything.
— Some parishioners prefer confession in this form: “I sinned against such and such a commandment.” This is convenient: “I sinned against the seventh” - and there is no need to say anything more.
“I believe this is completely unacceptable.” Any formalization of spiritual life kills this life. Sin is the pain of the human soul. If there is no pain, then there is no repentance. St. John Climacus says that the forgiveness of our sins is evidenced by the pain that we feel when we repent of them. If we do not experience pain, we have every reason to doubt that our sins have been forgiven. And the Monk Barsanuphius the Great, answering questions different people, has repeatedly said that a sign of forgiveness is a loss of sympathy for previously committed sins. This is the change that must happen to a person, an internal turn.
- Another common opinion: why would I repent if I know that I won’t change anyway - it will be hypocrisy and hypocrisy on my part.
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But here is a situation known to me personally: a girl regularly came to one of the Moscow churches and confessed that she earned her living by what is, as they say, the most ancient profession. No one allowed her to receive Communion, of course, but she continued to walk, prayed, and tried to somehow participate in the life of the parish. I don’t know if she managed to leave this craft, but I know for sure that the Lord protects her and does not leave her, waiting for the necessary change.
It is very important to believe in the forgiveness of sins, in the power of the Sacrament. Those who do not believe complain that after confession there is no relief, that they leave the church with a heavy soul. This comes from a lack of faith, even from a lack of faith in forgiveness. Faith should give a person joy, and if there is no faith, there is no need to hope for any spiritual experiences and emotions.
- Sometimes it happens that some long-standing (usually) action of ours evokes in us a reaction that is more humorous than repentant, and it seems to us that talking about this action in confession is excessive zeal, bordering on hypocrisy or coquetry. Example: I suddenly remember that once in my youth I stole a book from the library of a holiday home. I think that we need to say this in confession: no matter how you look at it, the eighth commandment has been broken. And then it becomes funny...
“I wouldn’t take it so lightly.” There are actions that cannot even be formally committed, because they destroy us - not even as people of faith, but simply as people of conscience. There are certain barriers that we must set for ourselves. These saints could have spiritual freedom, which allows them to do things that are formally condemned, but they did them only when these actions were for the good.
— Is it true that you do not need to repent of sins committed before Baptism if you were baptized in adulthood?
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— We have talked quite a lot here about how to prepare for confession, but what should we read or, as they say, proofread at home the day before, what prayers? The prayer book contains the Follow-up to Holy Communion. Do I need to proofread it in its entirety and is that enough? In addition, Communion may not follow confession. What to read before confession?
— It’s very good if a person reads before confession Penitential canon To the Savior. There is also a very good Penitential Canon Mother of God. This could be simply a prayer with the repentant feeling “God, be merciful to me, a sinner.” And it is very important, remembering every sin committed, bringing to the heart the awareness of its destruction for us, from the heart, in your own words, ask God for forgiveness for it, simply standing in front of icons or bowing. To come to what St. Nicodemus the Holy Mountainer calls the feeling of being “guilty.” That is, to feel: I am dying, and I am aware of it, and I am not justifying myself. I recognize myself as worthy of this death. But with this I go to God, surrender myself before His love and hope for His mercy, believing in it.
Abbot Nikon (Vorobyov) has a wonderful letter to a certain woman, no longer young, who, due to age and illness, had to prepare for the transition to Eternity. He writes to her: “Remember all your sins and repent of each one - even the one you confessed - before God until you feel that the Lord forgives you. It’s not a charm to feel that the Lord forgives; this is what the holy fathers called joyful crying—repentance that brings joy.” This is the most necessary thing - to feel peace with God.
Interviewed by Marina Biryukova
Confession is a sacrament when a believer confesses their sins to a priest. The representative of the church has the right to forgive sins in the name of the Lord and Jesus Christ.
By biblical stories, Christ endowed the apostles with such an opportunity, which was later passed on to the clergy. During repentance, a person not only talks about his sins, but also gives his word not to commit them again.
What is confession?
Confession is not only cleansing, but also a test for the soul. It helps to remove the burden and cleanse yourself before the face of the Lord, reconcile with him and overcome internal doubts. You need to go to confession once a month, but if you want to do it more often, you should follow the urges of your soul and repent any time you want.
For especially serious sins, a church representative can impose a special punishment called penance. This can be long prayer, fasting or abstinence, which are ways to purify oneself. When a person violates God's laws, it negatively affects his mental and physical well-being. Repentance helps to gain strength and fight the temptations that push people to sin. The believer gets the opportunity to talk about his misdeeds and remove the burden from his soul. Before confession, it is necessary to make a list of sins, with the help of which you can correctly describe the sin and prepare the correct speech for repentance.
How to start a confession to the priest with what words?
The seven deadly sins, which are the main vices, look like this:
- gluttony (gluttony, excessive food abuse)
- fornication (dissolute life, infidelity)
- anger (hot temper, vindictiveness, irritability)
- love of money (greed, desire for material values)
- despondency (laziness, depression, despair)
- vanity (selfishness, sense of narcissism)
- envy
It is believed that when committing these sins, the human soul can perish. By committing them, a person moves further and further away from God, but all of them can be released during sincere repentance. It is believed that it was mother nature who laid them in every person, and only the strongest in spirit can resist temptations and fight evil. But it is worth remembering that every person can commit a sin while going through a difficult period in life. People are not immune from misfortunes and difficulties that can drive everyone to despair. You need to learn to fight passions and emotions, and then no sin will be able to overcome you and ruin your life.
Preparing for Confession
It is necessary to prepare for repentance in advance. First you need to find a temple where the sacraments are held and choose the appropriate day. Most often they are held on holidays and weekends. At this time, there are always a lot of people in the temple, and not everyone will be able to open up when strangers are nearby. In this case, you need to contact the priest and ask him to make an appointment on another day when you can be alone. Before repentance, it is recommended to read the Canon of Repentance, which will allow you to tune in and put your thoughts in order.
You need to know that there are three groups of sins that can be written down and taken with you to confession.
- Vices against God:
These include blasphemy and insulting the Lord, blasphemy, interest in occult sciences, superstition, thoughts of suicide, excitement, and so on.
- Vices against the soul:
Laziness, deceit, use obscene words, impatience, disbelief, self-delusion, despair.
- Vices against neighbors:
Disrespect for parents, slander, condemnation, rancor, hatred, theft, and so on.
How to confess correctly, what should you say to the priest at the beginning?
Before approaching a church representative, get out of your head bad thoughts and get ready to bare your soul. You can start confession in the following way: how to confess correctly, what to say to the priest, for example: “Lord, I have sinned before you,” and after that you can list your sins. There is no need to tell the priest about the sin in great detail; it is enough to just say “Committed adultery” or confess to another vice.
But to the list of sins you can add “I sinned with envy, I constantly envy my neighbor...” and so on. After listening to you, the priest will be able to give valuable advice and help you act correctly in a given situation. Such clarifications will help identify your greatest weaknesses and combat them. The confession ends with the words “I repent, Lord! Save and have mercy on me, a sinner!”
Many confessors are very ashamed to talk about anything; this is an absolutely normal feeling. But at the moment of repentance, you need to overcome yourself and understand that it is not the priest who condemns you, but God, and that it is God who you tell about your sins. The priest is just a conductor between you and the Lord, do not forget about this.
List of sins for a woman
Many representatives of the fair sex, having become familiar with it, decide to refuse confession. It looks like this:
- Rarely prayed and came to church
- During prayer I thought about pressing problems
- Had sex before marriage
- Had unclean thoughts
- I turned to fortune tellers and magicians for help
- Believed in superstitions
- I was afraid of old age
- Abused alcohol, drugs, sweets
- Refused to help other people
- Performed abortions
- Wearing revealing clothes
List of sins for a man
- Blasphemy against the Lord
- Disbelief
- Ridicule of those who are weaker
- Cruelty, pride, laziness, greed
- Evasion of military service
- Insults and use of physical force against others
- Slander
- Inability to resist temptations
- Refusal to help relatives and other people
- Theft
- Rudeness, contempt, greed
A man needs to take a more responsible approach to this issue, since he is the head of the family. It is from him that children will take their role model.
There is also a list of sins for a child, which can be compiled after he answers a series of specific questions. He must understand how important it is to speak sincerely and honestly, but this already depends on the approach of the parents and their preparation of their child for confession.
The importance of confession in the life of a believer
Many holy fathers call confession the second baptism. This helps to establish unity with God and cleanse oneself of filth. As the Gospel says, repentance is necessary condition to cleanse the soul. Throughout life path a person must strive to overcome temptations and prevent vice. During this sacrament, a person receives liberation from the shackles of sin, and all his sins are forgiven by the Lord God. For many, repentance is a victory over oneself, because only a true believer can admit what people prefer to remain silent about.
If you have confessed before, then you should not talk about old sins again. They have already been released and there is no point in repenting for them anymore. When you finish confessing, the priest will give his speech, give advice and instructions, and also say a prayer of permission. After this, the person must cross himself twice, bow, venerate the crucifix and the Gospel, then cross himself again and receive a blessing.
How to confess for the first time - an example?
The first confession may seem mysterious and unpredictable. People are frightened by the expectation that they might be judged by a priest and experience a feeling of shame and embarrassment. It is worth remembering that representatives of the church are people who live according to the laws of the Lord. They do not judge, do not wish harm to anyone and love their neighbors, trying to help them with wise advice.
They will never express a personal point of view, so you should not be afraid that the priest’s words may somehow hurt, offend or shame you. He never shows emotion, speaks in a low voice and speaks very little. Before repentance, you can approach him and ask for advice on how to properly prepare for this sacrament.
There is a lot of literature in church shops that can also help and give a lot important information. During repentance, you should not complain about others and your life; you need to talk only about yourself, listing the vices to which you have succumbed. If you adhere to fasting, then this is the best moment for confession, because by limiting themselves, people become more restrained and improve, contributing to the purification of the soul.
Many parishioners end their fast with confession, which is the logical conclusion of long abstinence. This sacrament leaves in the human soul the most bright emotions and impressions that are never forgotten. By relieving the soul of sins and receiving their forgiveness, a person gets a chance to start life anew, resist temptations and live in harmony with the Lord and his laws.
Confession is considered Christian rite, in which the confessing person repents and repents of his sins in the hope of forgiveness by God Christ. The Savior himself established this sacrament and told the disciples the words that are written in the Gospel of Matthew, ch. 18, verse 18. This is also spoken of in the Gospel of John, ch. 20, verses 22 – 23.
Sacrament of Confession
According to the holy fathers, repentance is also considered a second baptism. Man during baptism cleansed from sin the firstborn, who was passed on to everyone from the first ancestors Adam and Eve. And after the rite of baptism, during repentance, personal thoughts are washed away. When a person performs the sacrament of repentance, he must be honest and aware of his sins, sincerely repenting of them, and not repeat the sin, believing in the hope of salvation by Jesus Christ and His mercy. The priest reads a prayer and cleansing from sins occurs.
Many who do not want to repent of their sins often say that they have no sins: “I didn’t kill, I didn’t steal, I didn’t commit adultery, so I have nothing to repent of?” This is stated in the first Epistle of John in the first chapter, verse 17 - “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.” This means that sinful events happen every day, if you understand the essence God's commandments. There are three categories of sin: sin against the Lord God, sin against loved ones and sin against oneself.
List of sins against Jesus Christ
List of sins against loved ones
List of sins against yourself
All listed sins are divided into three categories, in the final analysis, all this is against the Lord God. After all, a violation of the commandments He created is carried out, therefore, a direct insult to God occurs. All these sins do not produce positive fruits, but on the contrary, the soul will not be saved from this.
Proper preparation for confession
It is necessary to prepare for the sacrament of confession with all seriousness; for this purpose, one should engage in early preparation. Enough remember and write down on a piece of paper all the sins committed, and also read detailed information about the sacrament of confession. You should take a piece of paper for the ceremony and read everything again before the process. The same sheet can be given to the confessor, but grave sins must be spoken out loud. It is enough to talk about the sin itself, and not list long stories, for example, if there is enmity in the family, and with neighbors, one should repent of the main sin - condemnation of neighbors and loved ones.
In this ritual, the confessor and God are not interested in numerous sins, the meaning itself is important - sincere repentance for sins committed, a sincere feeling of a person, a contrite heart. Confession is not just awareness of one’s sinful past deeds, but also desire to wash them away. Justifying oneself for sins is not cleansing, it is unacceptable. Elder Silouan of Athos said that if a person hates sin, then God also asks for these sins.
It will be great if a person draws conclusions from each passing day, and each time truly repents of his sins, writing them down on paper, and for serious sins it is necessary to confess to a confessor in the church. You should immediately ask for forgiveness from people who have been offended by word or deed. IN Orthodox prayer book there is a rule - the Canon of Penitence, which must be read intensively in the evenings before the sacrament of confession itself.
It is important to find out the church schedule and what day you can go to confession. There are many churches in which daily services are held, and the daily sacrament of confession also takes place there. And in the rest you should inquire about the schedule church services .
How to Confess to Children
Children under seven years of age are considered infants and can receive communion without prior confession. But it is important to accustom them from childhood to a sense of reverence. Without necessary preparation frequent communion causes reluctance to engage in this matter. Preferably prepare children for the sacrament in a few days, example - reading Holy Scripture and children's Orthodox literature. Reduce TV viewing time. Monitor the implementation of morning and evening prayers. If a child has done bad things over the past few days, then you should talk to him and instill in him a feeling of shame for what he has done. But you always need to know: the child follows the example of his parents.
After the age of seven, you can begin confession on the same basis as adults, but without the preliminary sacrament. The sins listed above are fulfilled in large quantities and children, so children's communion has its own nuances.
To help children sincerely confess, it is necessary to give a list of sins:
This is a superficial list of possible sins. There are many personal sins for each child based on their thoughts and actions. An important goal of parents is to prepare the child for repentance. Need a child he wrote down all his sins without the participation of his parents- you shouldn’t write him down. He must understand that it is necessary to sincerely admit and repent of bad deeds.
How to confess in church
Confession falls on morning and evening time days. It is considered unacceptable to be late for such an event. A group of repentants begins the process by reading the rites. When the priest begins to ask the names of the participants who came to confession, you need to answer neither loudly nor quietly. Latecomers are not accepted for confession. At the end of confession, the priest reads the rite again, receiving the sacrament. Women during natural monthly cleansing are not allowed to participate in such an event.
You need to behave with dignity in church and not disturb other confessors and the priest. It is not allowed to embarrass the people who came to this event. There is no need to confess one category of sins and leave another later. Those sins that were named last time are not re-read. It is advisable to perform the sacrament from the same confessor. In the sacrament, a person repents not before his confessor, but before the Lord God.
In large churches many penitents gather and in this case it is used "general confession". The point is that the priest pronounces common sins, and those confessing repent. Next, everyone must come to the prayer of permission. When confession takes place for the first time, you should not come to such a general procedure.
First time visit private confession, if there is none, then at general confession you need to take the last place in line and listen to what they say to the priest during confession. It is advisable to explain the whole situation to the priest; he will tell you how to confess for the first time. Next comes true repentance. If during the process of repentance a person kept silent about a serious sin, then he will not be forgiven. At the end of the sacrament, a person is obliged, after reading the prayer of permission, to kiss the Gospel and the cross, which lie on the lectern.
Proper preparation for communion
On the days of fasting, which last seven days, fasting is established. The diet should not include fish, dairy, meat and egg products. On such days, sexual intercourse should not be performed. It is necessary to attend church frequently. Read the Penitential Canon and follow the prayer rules. On the eve of the sacrament, you must arrive for the service in the evening. Before going to bed, you should read the canons of the Archangel Michael, our Lord Jesus Christ and the Mother of God. If this is not possible, such prayer rules can be shifted by several days during the fast.
Children have a hard time remembering and perceiving prayer rules, so you should choose the number that is within your power, but you need to discuss this with your confessor. To prepare gradually you need 
increase the quantity prayer rules
. Most people confuse the rules of confession and communion. Here you need to prepare step by step. To do this, you should ask for advice from a priest, who will advise you on more precise preparation.
Sacrament of Communion carried out on an empty stomach, you should not consume food and water after 12 o’clock, and you should also not smoke. This does not apply to children under seven years of age. But they need to be accustomed to this a year before the adult sacrament. Must read morning prayers and for Holy Communion. During morning confession, you must arrive at the right time without being late.
Participle
The Lord God established the sacrament during the hours of the Last Supper, when Christ broke bread with his disciples and drank wine with them. Participle helps you enter the Kingdom of Heaven, therefore incomprehensible to the human mind. Women are not allowed to attend communion wearing makeup, or even on regular Sundays you should wipe off any residue from your lips. On menstrual days, women are not allowed to participate in the Sacrament., as well as those who have recently given birth, for the latter you need to read the prayer for the fortieth day.
When the priest comes out with the Holy Gifts, participants are required to bow. Next, you need to listen carefully to the prayers, repeating to yourself. Then you should cross your arms across your chest and approach the bowl. Children should go first, then men, and then women. Near the cup one’s name is pronounced and thereby the communicant receives the Gifts of the Lord. After communion, the deacon treats his lips with a plate, then you need to kiss the edge of the cup and approach the table. Here the person takes a drink and consumes the prosphora portion.
At the end, participants listen to prayers and pray until the end of the service. Then you should go to the cross and listen carefully prayer of thanksgiving. At the end, everyone goes home, but in church you cannot speak empty words and disturb each other. On this day you need to behave with dignity and not defile your purity with sinful deeds.
Not all people, even those baptized in the church, regularly confess. Most often, this is prevented by a feeling of awkwardness, embarrassment, or pride stops someone. Many, not accustomed to confessing to early years, at a more mature age, they constantly postpone the moment when they will need to talk about their sins for the first time. Every year it becomes more and more difficult to decide to go to confession. In order to remove the burden from your soul, begin to talk with God and sincerely repent of your sins, you should learn how to confess correctly. Going to confession will definitely help you: you yourself will feel how your soul brightens.
Confession is one of the most significant rituals in christian church. The ability to realize one’s sins and tell God about them, to repent of what one has done, is very important for a believer.
What is confession for us?
First of all, it is important to understand the essence of confession, its role in our lives.
- Conversation with God. You can confess at home, in front of an icon, immersed in prayer. However, it is precisely going to church for confession that has special meaning. There you will talk with God in his Temple, and the priest will become your guide. Please note: you will not be telling about your sins to a mortal man, but to God himself. The priest has power from God, he can give you helpful advice, explain to you the reasons for your actions, help you overcome misconceptions. It is the priest who has the right to absolve you of your sins by placing an epitrachelion on your head.
- Humility of pride. By sincerely telling the priest about your sins, you humble your pride. Confessing is very important, there is nothing shameful or uncomfortable about it. The sacrament of confession is designed so that you can cleanse your soul, recognize your sins and repent of them. This is only possible if you really open your soul in church, tell everything to the priest without concealment, without hiding or minimizing anything.
- Repentance. You should not think that confessing sins is bad. Man is sinful by nature; there are no absolutely righteous people on earth. But you have the power to become better. Recognition of one's mistakes and delusions, bad deeds, deep repentance for sins committed is necessary for every person for further development and self-improvement.
Getting ready for confession
Plays a huge role proper preparation to confession. You will need to tune in to communicate with God, have a sincere conversation with the priest. Prepare yourself internally and externally, provide for certain moments.
- Focus. Sit at home in a calm environment. Try to get into the idea that you are about to communicate with God in his Temple. You are preparing for a responsible task in your life. Don't be distracted by anything.
- Pray. You can read prayers to get in the mood for confession. Read the prayers of John Chrysostom.
- Remember your sins. Start with the mortal sins. Perhaps you have sinned through anger, pride or love of money. Please note that abortion in the church is considered murder. Such a sin should be noted first.
- Get ready for confession. It is important to recall the pictures of your sins in your memory and to repent of your sins sincerely. Church ministers recommend taking a long time to prepare for confession. It’s good if you pray a lot, fast for a while, and remember your sins in solitude.
- Write down your sins. Take Blank sheet paper and list your sins on it. This will make it easier for you to remember everything during confession. It is especially important to use such a piece of paper at the first, general, confession, when it is necessary to talk about the sins committed throughout your life.
- Pay attention to your appearance. A woman should wear a skirt below the knees and a closed jacket. You need to tie a scarf around your head. It is important to refrain from wearing cosmetics. You can't paint your lips because you have to venerate the cross. Men should not wear shorts, even if it is hot outside. It is better to cover the body with clothes.
Answering the question “how to properly confess in the Orthodox Church,” priests often note that even parishioners who regularly visit the Temple of God do not always tell the truth about their sins. It is very important to take confession seriously and not turn it into an ordinary formality. Only then will you be able to truly cleanse your soul.
- General confession. First, you can attend general confession. Everyone comes there, and the priest lists during such a confession all the sins that people commit most often. Perhaps you have forgotten some of your sins: a general confession will help you remember it.
- Sincere repentance. You need sincere repentance in sins. Remember that the essence of confession is not a dry listing of sins committed. God already knows your errors and sins. First of all, you need confession: it will help you repent of your mistakes, realize your sins, and not commit them in the future. Only by coming to confession with deep repentance can you cleanse your soul and receive forgiveness from the Lord.
- No haste. At an individual confession, you will need to tell about all your sins and do it sincerely. Do not hurry. If you feel that you have not fully repented, it is important to ask to extend the time of confession.
- Talk about your sins in detail. Priests advise not to limit yourself to a simple listing of names: “pride”, “envy”, etc. In a conversation with a priest, indicate the reasons that prompted you to sin, tell specific cases, describe situations. Then the church minister will be able to understand your thoughts, the essence of your sins, and will be able to give you invaluable advice. Having received instructions from a priest that will help you fight sinfulness, you will begin to build your life differently.
- Don't sight read. You should not read out the list of sins from a piece of paper or simply give the piece of paper to the priest. By this you neutralize the entire sacrament of confession. At confession you can really become purer, get closer to God, and receive remission of sins. To do this, you need to understand the essence of sin, sincerely repent, and heed the advice of the priest. The piece of paper is needed only so that you do not forget to tell about some of your sins and can confess correctly.
- Analysis and self-improvement. When confessing, you must fully analyze your life, your spiritual world, consider not only actions, but also inclinations and thoughts. You carry out a kind of work on mistakes in order to cleanse your soul of committed sins, removing their burden from it, and prevent new sins.
- Full confession. Tell the priest everything about your sins, putting aside your pride. The fear of admitting to a sin, even a shameful one, should not stop you. You cannot hide your sins during confession.
- Faith in forgiveness. During confession, it is important to sincerely repent and firmly believe in the forgiveness of the Almighty.
- Go to confession regularly. Going to general confession once, believing that you shouldn’t confess often is a mistaken position. Unfortunately, we are all sinful. Confession supports in a believer his desire for light, repentance, and provides a path to correction.