Rules for weddings in the Orthodox Church. How is a wedding carried out in the Orthodox Church? What is needed for a wedding

A church wedding is a sacred rite consisting of seven sacraments. At that time loving person transfers his own thoughts, desires, aspirations and himself into the hands of his loved one. A church wedding obliges each spouse to preserve the family. The newlyweds are blessed for procreation and a happy family life. What do you need for a wedding? The ritual involves observing certain rules that do not have legal force, so following them depends on the spouses. They are obliged to preserve the bonds of marriage and protect them from vain passions.

How to prepare for the sacrament of wedding?

Wedding is a spiritual process of union between husband and wife. At this moment, the couple takes responsibility for the preservation of the marriage, so it is important to be confident in your own decision. The wedding procedure requires preliminary preparation. The bride and groom must receive communion and confession before the church wedding. First of all, you should decide on the question of what is needed for the ceremony, can the newlyweds get married? There are several conditions prohibiting marriage:

  • The engagement will not take place with spiritual relatives.
  • The marriage is not approved by blood relatives.
  • The bride must not be younger than 16 years old, and the husband must not be 18 years old.
  • It is allowed to be married only three times.
  • If one of the spouses is not a Christian, then the sacrament cannot be performed.
  • Commitment to atheism.
  • The actual marriage of one newlywed to another person.
  • The age difference is too big.

Fasting before confession and communion

What needs to be done before the wedding? A couple of weeks before the sacrament, you need to familiarize yourself with the rules of weddings in the temple. This is required for preparation in spiritual and organizational terms. Newlyweds need to fast before communion and confession: three days of prayer, fasting, and attending evening services. The priest will tell you what prayers to read. You need to refrain from consuming animal products - dairy, meat, eggs. Marriage should be abandoned.

Pay attention to improving your own soul. To do this, you need to go to church, where the priests talk about the essence of fasting and its correct observance. IN Everyday life do not allow idle talk, unkind thoughts, be more humble and meek. It is necessary to give up entertainment and entertainment television programs, events, shows, and read spiritual literature.

What you need to buy for a wedding in a church

Preparations for the wedding should begin a couple of weeks before the ceremony itself. Consult with the rector of the temple you have chosen. He will tell you in detail about what is needed for a wedding and how to prepare for it. Find out about the amount of donation for the needs of the temple as a sign of gratitude for the sacrament. What do you need to purchase for the wedding ceremony? You will need: wedding candles, wedding rings, icons, canvas.

Icons

Icons will be needed for the wedding. They are called the wedding couple: icons of Jesus Christ, the Blessed Virgin Mary. The meaning of these icons is symbolic for a married couple. The face of the Savior is blessed by the spouse, intercessor, protector, savior of future children, his wife. His image will remind the head of the family throughout his life of his responsibility to his loved ones.

The icon of the Mother of God blesses the spouse, who will become the mother and keeper of the hearth. During weddings, in most cases, the Kazan Icon of the Mother of God is used, which is the protector of family well-being. During the wedding sacrament, the icons lie in front of the altar on a lectern. Married spouses with images in their hands leave the temple in a new spiritual perception and status. These icons become a symbol family life. They do not need to be removed far from the eyes of people entering the house.

The chosen images will accompany the couple throughout their lives. Before them, spouses pray in joyful and sad times. Intercessors protect family well-being, help maintain mutual understanding, respect, and patience with each other and the people around them. Icons are often given by parents at weddings as a sign of blessing the union. It is not forbidden to purchase them yourself.

If the wedding couple is made to order, then they are painted simultaneously, in the same style, like a solid icon. This emphasizes the inseparability and unity of the spouses who undergo a church wedding ceremony. On the margins of the wedding couple may be depicted heavenly patrons bride and groom, guardian angels. Icons of this type are individual, reminiscent of family iconography in complexity.

Crosses for newlyweds and guests

A mandatory attribute of any person who crosses the church threshold is considered pectoral crosses. They are needed for the wedding. This applies to both those getting married and guests of the celebration. If someone shows up in church without a cross, there is no need to worry, because they are available for sale in any church. Pectoral crosses do not have to be made using precious metals.

Wedding rings

According to ancient tradition For the wedding ceremony, two rings were purchased - silver and gold. Silver symbolized the light of the moon and the feminine principle, and gold symbolized sunlight and masculine strength. Today, this tradition is practically not observed. In most cases, identical silver or gold rings are purchased for weddings. It is not prohibited to buy jewelry that is encrusted with stones. However, it is better to choose simple rings, without pretentiousness. Before the wedding ceremony, the rings must be given to the priest.

White towel and four scarves

For the wedding ceremony you need to prepare two towels. These can be elegant white cuts, or towels decorated with protective wedding symbols. In some cases, simply pieces of white cloth are used. One towel is placed under the feet of the couple, and the other is tied to their hands. These items are kept by spouses for a happy family life. Also, for the wedding you need to prepare four scarves: two for the couple to wrap the candles, two for the witnesses who hold the crown.

Candles and a bottle of church cahors

What do newlyweds need for a wedding? When performing a church wedding ceremony, the newlyweds must hold candles, which should be blessed in advance. They are purchased in a shop at a church or other place. Usually they buy special candles for the holiday. The newlyweds must keep them in their home for life. According to folk beliefs, these attributes have strong defensive ability. For example, candles are used as a talisman if the wife’s pregnancy is difficult.

Church Cahors, which is needed for weddings, is a fortified wine. The peculiarity of the drink production technology is to achieve such qualities as sweetness, bright red intense color, rich grape taste. Cahors is used during the sacrament. The symbolism of this drink is its similarity to the blood of Christ.

Crowns for witnesses and a headdress for the bride

What else do you need for a wedding? During the ceremony, crowns are placed on the heads of the bride and groom, held by witnesses. These attributes have three symbolic meanings:

  • Martyr's crowns, personifying the martyrdom of a married couple who daily crucify their own selfishness in marriage.
  • Royal crowns, when worn, glory and honor are proclaimed to man as the king of creation. The bride and groom become queen and king for each other.
  • The crowns of the Kingdom of God, where a godly marriage life opens the way.

The bride's headdress is considered a mandatory attribute during a wedding. According to existing traditions, the newlywed's head must be covered, but her face must be open before God. It can be a scarf, shawl, scarf that covers the shoulders and head of the young woman. It is allowed to wear a veil at a wedding, which is preferred by the majority modern girls. The veil adds mystery and beauty to the bride's image.

The wedding ceremony is very ancient custom, which has not lost its relevance over time. To this day, happy lovers, having sealed themselves with marriage bonds in the registry office, go to church to testify their union before God. There are certain rules for weddings; you will learn from this article how to prepare for this sacred sacrament, as well as how it happens.

Unfortunately, not all people can be allowed to participate in this ritual. So, a wedding will not be available to you in the following cases:

  1. If you have already performed this ritual three times. But even the second wedding will be quite problematic.
  2. In the case when one of the lovers or both at once do not adhere to Christianity, were not baptized in Orthodox church and have no desire to be baptized before the wedding.
  3. If one of the lovers has a valid church or civil marriage union (in the first situation, permission from the bishop will be required to dissolve the union).
  4. It is prohibited for people who are closely related (up to the fourth generation) to get married. It is also not permissible to have a wedding in the case of a spiritual relationship (for example, for godfather and godfather, godson and godparent, and so on).
  5. The ban applies to mentally ill people.
  6. Also, the priest will not agree to marry atheists who resort to the ceremony not for spiritual reasons, but for some other reasons (at the will of their parents, as a tribute to fashion, and so on).
  7. For a wedding, you must have a marriage registration certificate, as well as passports with stamps.
  8. A girl can get married in a church if she is already sixteen years old, and a guy - from eighteen years old.

What you will need for the wedding ceremony

If you want to film the ritual or take a photo, be sure to discuss these points in advance. It is important that during the process of the sacred sacrament nothing distracts the clergyman and all those gathered from the ritual.

Witnesses who were baptized in an Orthodox church are important for a wedding. Think about who is best suited for this role - after all, the best men will have to hold the crown over the heads of the newlyweds throughout the ritual. Therefore, it is advisable to choose witnesses who are tall and have sufficient endurance.

First you will need to stock up on the following necessary arsenal:


The wedding ceremony lasts about sixty minutes, so make sure you also have comfortable shoes.

How to prepare for the ritual

Most important aspect- be in a harmonious state of mind and sincerely desire to perform this ritual.

In addition, the newlyweds will need to fast three days before the wedding. Confession and communion are also performed before the wedding.

By default, the wedding starts at twelve o'clock at night, from this time you need to refrain from drinking food, water, alcoholic beverages and not smoking. Sexual contacts are prohibited.

Upon arrival at the church, the newlyweds will first need to confess and receive communion, and after that they will need to change into a special wedding attire.

What should behavior be like in church?

A temple is a sacred place worth adhering to certain rules behavior, namely:

  • Women put on hats, crosses and proper clothing, cover their arms and legs;
  • You need to put on makeup before going on a hike within reason;
  • People come to the church fifteen minutes before the ceremony starts, light candles and touch the images;
  • You must turn off your cell phone while in the temple;
  • It is prohibited to talk during the service;
  • While the ceremony is taking place, you cannot move around the temple;
  • Only elderly or sick people sit in church;
  • The male half occupies right side hall, and the women's - left;
  • It is not allowed to approach the altar;
  • It is forbidden to hold each other's hands in church;
  • Hands should not be placed in pockets;
  • They do not turn their backs on icons;
  • If for some reason you are unable to stand through the entire wedding ceremony, the correct thing to do would be to stand at the entrance to the church, but not leave the service before the appointed time;
  • Orthodox people should be baptized with right hand.

It is important that both the wedding couple themselves and the guests who are present at the ceremony adhere to the described rules.

How is the wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church carried out?

An Orthodox wedding is performed in two stages:

  • the first is engagement;
  • and the second is the wedding itself.

The ceremony itself goes like this:

  1. First, the deacon brings out the rings on a special platter.
  2. The priest approaches the newlyweds and hands them lighted candles.
  3. Then the priest holds a plate in front of the young couple with rings on it and invites them to exchange them 3 times. The bride and groom must first pass the rings to each other three times on a tray and then put on theirs. This represents harmony, mutual assistance and unity in a marriage union.
  4. After these actions, the priest takes the newlywed’s crown and baptizes him with the help of this wreath. Then he gives the groom to touch with his lips the image of the Savior attached to the crown. Then the crown is placed on the head of the newlywed.
  5. A similar ritual is performed for the bride. But the girl’s crown is decorated with the image of the Mother of God, which she must kiss.

Note! The process of placing a wedding crown on the head of the bride and groom symbolizes that from now on they are king and queen for each other.

  1. Then a cup of wine is brought. The priest baptizes it and gives it to the newlyweds, and they must drain the cup to the bottom three times.

The cup symbolizes the unity of destinies, as well as the willingness to experience both joyful and sad moments in life together.

  1. Then the priest, with his own hand, joins the right hands of the bride and groom and passes them around the lectern three times. This action is also symbolic, it marks that from now on the young should always walk hand in hand with each other.
  2. Approaching the royal doors, the groom should kiss the icon of the Savior, and the bride - the Mother of God, then they change places.
  3. At the end, the priest allows the newlyweds to touch the Cross with their lips and hands over two images: the icon of the Son of God (the groom) and the Mother of God (the bride). They are taken home and secured above their bed.

The actions described above make the newlyweds not just legal spouses before the state, but also before the face of the Lord. Divorcing a wedding is much more difficult than a regular marriage; this will require permission from a clergyman.

Watch the wedding ceremony in the following video

Starting a family is responsible and extraordinary important step in the life of every adult. Having decided to get married, a young man and a girl thereby confirm their spiritual maturity, recognizing the complexity of the tasks that will radically change their lives in the future. Therefore, future spouses often ask the Lord God for help and support, which he invisibly sends sacrament of wedding. How to properly prepare for a wedding to be worthy of God's grace? Sincere Faith and compliance with church rules are the two main pillars of those getting married.

Spiritual cleansing is the most important principle before marriage

Future spouses may be churchgoers, but this is not necessary. The most important thing is that they realize the need to receive the blessing from above that is sent by the sacrament. What should you do in preparation for your wedding?

  1. The bride and groom accompany spiritual cleansing with physical cleansing. That's why Before the wedding it is necessary to fast for several days. Meat, dairy dishes, and products containing eggs are excluded. This will help change the direction of thoughts and give purity to thoughts. You should also renounce sexual intercourse and repent in confession if it occurred;
  2. On the eve of the wedding, future spouses must attend vespers and then confess to their spiritual father. Participle the newlyweds receive it in the morning, on the wedding day. A few days before the wedding, the priest holds a confidential and instructive conversation with the newlyweds, in which he outlines the most important canons of the Christian family. There may be several such conversations if the priest sees a need for them;
  3. Prayer and repentance– the most important stages preparation for the sacrament. After all, when getting married, young people should be as pure and open as possible before God. Of course, no one will be able to discover any deception for the time being, but our Heavenly Father knows everything. We are all sinners, therefore, sincerely regretting our actions (whether fornication, premarital cohabitation, sinful acts), asking forgiveness from God, through his servant, the holy father, we receive forgiveness, peace and grace;
  4. It is unthinkable to hide anything during confession, because the Lord knows everything. And you should not be afraid to open your soul, because the Lord God knows his children and rejoices more over one lost but returned sheep than over nine that are saved;
  5. If newlyweds are not familiar with the Bible and prayers, they should definitely learn the Lord's Prayer "Our Father" and "Creed", try to understand their spiritual essence. It will be very good if young people read at least the Gospel of the Apostle Mark.

The trepidation and excitement that future spouses experience before the wedding ceremony is quite understandable. During this period, they are overshadowed by the holy spirit, which helps to cleanse their soul and body before the sacrament. Therefore, sincere daily prayer for the bestowal of prosperity in the family being created is very important.

Some material and official aspects of the wedding

What clothes should be, what should you purchase before the wedding? The church-going sisters or the priest himself will tell you about this. We will also tell you about this:

  • Bride's clothes should not be provocative. So, the dress should be purchased closed; a large neckline, bare back and arms are not allowed. A veil and headdress in the form of a wreath or hat are required. If the dress is open, you can cover your shoulders and back with a veil. The length of the wedding dress should not be above the knee. Important rule: this dress must be kept in the family after the ceremony, so you cannot rent it;
  • According to church canons, the husband should wear at the wedding Golden ring , since it symbolizes the sun, as the main luminary in the family, for the wife - silver (as a sign of a lesser luminary - the moon). But this is an old rule; now wedding rings for both husband and wife are usually made of gold. What rings to buy for young people is up to them to decide;
  • Before the wedding you should purchase icons of the Mother of God or Father Pantocrator(unless there is a family heirloom at home that can be passed on through generations). They are placed on the throne and after the wedding become a home shrine of the newly created family;
  • About wedding candles, a bottle of church wine or Cahors, a snow-white dress, which the newlyweds will become, also needs to be taken care of in advance. They can be bought in icon shops at churches or in special stores that sell properly consecrated products.

There are some official rules that may prevent a wedding. Future spouses should know them:

  1. In most churches, weddings do not take place until a civil marriage has been concluded. By this the Church shows respect for state laws;
  2. If one of the couple admits to being an atheist, saying that he came to church at the insistence of his parents or significant other, the wedding will not take place;
  3. It should be noted that marriages between relatives up to the fourth generation are also unacceptable, according to church canons. If one of the couple has even been in a civil registered marriage three times already, the church refuses to marry such people;
  4. If the bride and groom are not baptized, then there is nothing to worry about: they can go through the sacrament of baptism at any time, listen to several spiritual conversations - and then get married.

All questions that arise before the wedding must be agreed upon with the rector of the temple where you plan to unite yourself in marriage. There are no unsolvable issues, so your spiritual father will always come to your aid by prescribing repentance or fasting. The main thing before the wedding: go down the aisle with faith in a pure heart, the desire to create a happy family, firmly and unwaveringly fulfill your marital duty until death separates you.

The rite of the wedding ceremony in the form that exists now was formed back in the 1st century AD, that is, at the time of the birth of Christianity.

But the church wedding took place then after the liturgy - the most important Christian worship, and nowadays weddings are usually carried out as an independent event.

The purpose of the ritual is to take an oath of allegiance before God, to seal your union with God’s blessing and to receive a blessing for the birth and upbringing of future children.

The first part of the sacrament is betrothal

It aims to instill in the newlyweds the importance of the sacrament of marriage, to evoke awe and reverence in their hearts for this event.

Blessing

Initially, the “new brides” are located in the vestibule - an extension in front of the entrance to the temple, which is usually separated from the temple itself by a wall with a doorway. The groom stands on the right, the bride on the left, both turn to face the altar.

Wedding rings are placed on the altar table in advance and are kept there during the liturgy. When the wedding ceremony begins, the deacon, following the priest, carries them out on a special tray.

The priest, depicting Jesus Christ at this moment, approaches the newlyweds (they, in turn, are equated with the primordial ancestors Adam and Eve, starting a new and holy life in a pure marriage), holding in his hands two burning candles are a symbol of purity and chastity.

He blesses the groom three times and the bride three times, repeating: “In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit” (the young are baptized each time), hands them candles (or does not hand them over if one of those entering into marriage is getting married not the first time).

The blessing ends with a cross-shaped incense, which speaks of invisible presence at the sacrament of the grace of the Holy Spirit.

Engagement

After the blessing, the priest leads the newlyweds to the center of the temple.

Taking groom ring, he repeats three times: “The servant of God (name) is engaged to the servant of God (name) in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit,” each time making the sign of the cross over the groom’s head, and then puts a wedding ring on him ring finger right hand. By the way, on which hand do representatives of various faiths wear rings?

The priest performs the same actions with bride's ring, repeating three times: “The servant of God (name) is betrothed to the servant of God (name) in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

Exchange of rings

The newlyweds exchange their rings three times, thereby expressing agreement and unanimity and promising to give themselves to each other for life. The priest himself can change the rings.
During the ceremony, he also turns to the Almighty several times in prayer, asking the Lord to bless the newlyweds and confirm the betrothal.

How the wedding ceremony is performed

Conclusion of a natural marriage, or free union

The purpose of this stage is for the bride and groom to confirm their voluntary and inviolable intention to enter into marriage.

On the lectern (the so-called high rectangular table with a sloping top, which usually stands in front of the iconostasis in the middle of the church and is used during worship) lie the Gospel - symbol of the presence of Christ, the cross is a sign of his love, as well as crowns. In front of the lectern, a white or Pink colour- a symbol of purity and unity of life in marriage.

The bride and groom with lighted candles in their hands follow the priest with a censer (similar to will follow all the commandments of the Lord), stand on this platform and confirm in front of the church minister and everyone who came to the ceremony that their the decision to enter into legal marriage is voluntary and inviolable and that none of them had previously made a promise to any third party to marry him.

Wedding ceremony

The most important and crucial moment throughout the wedding ceremony.

Having read three prayers addressed to Jesus Christ and the Triune Lord, and asking them for all possible worldly and spiritual blessings for the young, the priest takes crown, baptizes the groom with it, after which he must kiss the image of Christ located on the front of the crown.

At the same time, the priest says: “The servant of God (name) is married to the servant of God (name) in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

Then also the priest blesses the bride, allowing her to venerate the image three times Holy Mother of God on the crown and saying: “The servant of God (name) is crowned with the servant of God (name) in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

Afterwards the priest reads three times secret prayer, each time blessing the newlyweds with a priestly blessing: “Lord our God, crown them with glory and honor.”

Crowns intended for the young, symbolize the crowns of the Kingdom of God- eternal life, remind of the crown of thorns once placed by the tormentors on the head of Jesus Christ, and also mean that in marriage a husband and wife should be one is like king and queen to the other.

After reading fragments of the messages of the Holy Apostles and the Gospel, in which the union of the newlyweds is compared with the union of Christ and the church, the priest calls on the newlyweds and everyone present to read the Lord’s Prayer together.

In token of devotion to the Lord and submission the young must bow their heads under the crowns.

Common cup or cup of fellowship

The priest brings wine to the newlyweds in one cup.

Red wine symbolizes true love, into which in the upcoming family life the young must turn the truth of their feelings, compared with pure fresh water: just as wine becomes better from year to year, so love should become deeper and more complete.

And a single cup is symbol common destiny young. The bride and groom drink wine three times and alternately in small sips.

Procession around the lectern

The priest connects the right hands of the young people, covering them with an epitrachelion - a long ribbon that goes around his neck and both ends descend to his chest. He places his hand on top, as if from Church faces handing over wife to husband.

Without releasing his hands, the priest leads the young people around the lectern three times.

Then the priest says: “Take their crowns in Thy Kingdom” and, reading the solemn prayer “Be magnified, O bridegroom, like Abraham,” he removes the crowns from the heads of the bride and groom, and they must kiss chastely, testifying to the holiness and purity of mutual love.

At the royal gates, the groom must kiss the icon of the Savior, and the bride must kiss the image Mother of God.

The newlyweds change places and again kiss the icon and the crucifix, and the priest hands them two icons, which were given to him in advance by the relatives of the newlyweds: for the groom - the image of the Savior, for the bride - the image of the Most Holy Theotokos.

The wedding ends with the proclamation of many years to the newlyweds and congratulations to the guests.

How long does a church wedding last?

The entire ritual lasts a total of about 40–50 minutes and is usually performed after Divine Liturgy– between 11.00 and 13.00.

Who can't get married and when?

The ritual can only be performed if certain conditions are met:

  • The sacrament of marriage is permitted only after registering the marriage at the registry office. However, if the church considers the circumstances preventing this to be respectful and serious, an exception may be made for people wishing to get married.
  • Can take part in a Christian wedding ceremony only believing baptized Orthodox Christians. Otherwise, a person does not have the right to be a participant in church sacraments.

Other restrictions include the following circumstances:

  • a significant difference in age (in this case, you must first obtain special permission from the bishop);
  • consanguinity up to the fourth degree;
  • marriage between step-relatives, between half-brothers (that is, having a common father) and half-uterine (having a common mother) brother and sister.
  • According to the church calendar, weddings do not take place on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays; on the days preceding the twelve and great holidays, as well as patronal temple days; during Christmastide and multi-day fasts (Great, Petrov, Uspensky, Rozhdestvensky), and also on September 10, 11, 26 and 27.

Preparation for the wedding

To ensure that the sacrament takes place in accordance with all the canons, and certain moments do not come as a surprise to anyone, it is worth preparing for the ritual in advance

  • Preliminary acquaintance with the clergy of the temple and choosing “your” priest. It is better to ask him in advance all the questions that concern you and clarify important details.
  • Advance registration– 2-3 weeks before the wedding itself. It is necessary to discuss with the priest not only the date, but also a specific time. Don't forget to include this item in .
  • Preparing the wedding dress. This moment should be approached especially responsibly, since church canons impose certain requirements on the color and cut of a wedding dress.
  • Purchasing attributes necessary for the ceremony. This includes icons, wedding candles, a towel, wedding rings, etc. It is better to clarify which icons are needed for a wedding in advance and then discuss it with the priest.
  • Spiritual Preparation. The decision to get married in a church should be balanced and conscious. The bride and groom who are about to walk down the aisle should prepare themselves mentally. Firstly, they must understand that a marriage celebrated in church cannot be dissolved arbitrarily, and violation of the vow of fidelity is an absolute sin. Secondly, on the eve of the wedding the young people will have to confess and receive communion, in advance - 3-4 days in advance - having prepared for these sacraments through fasting, that is, through the feat of fasting, prayer, repentance and communion. In some cases, the newlyweds are allowed to confess and receive communion on the wedding day immediately before the wedding.

Wedding in Orthodox Church- this is one of the seven main sacraments and believers try to observe the rules for it as carefully as possible. Wedding, along with baptism, confirmation, repentance, communion, priesthood and consecration of oil, constitute the center of spiritual life and embody the fullness of a person’s entry into church life. You will read everything that the bride and groom need to know before such an important step as a wedding in our detailed article. It will also be of interest to those who have already performed the sacrament, but want to learn more about it.

The meaning of a wedding in the Orthodox Church

According to the Christian worldview, two people are united in a union sanctified by God and become one flesh. That is why divorces, which are so common today in Christian circles, are considered an unnatural phenomenon, as if a mother decided not to live with the child she gave birth to. Sometimes such a rupture is associated with amputation of a limb or organ - a painful process that makes a person disabled.

The Lord created Adam and Eve and blessed them to multiply and fruit the earth. Adam immediately recognized the spiritual and physical relationship with his wife: the first thing he did when he saw Eve was call her his flesh and blood, because he fell in love with her:

“And the man said, Behold, this is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she will be called woman, for she was taken from [her] husband” (Gen. 2:23).

Therefore, before taking this step, people must realize the seriousness that they promise to God by this act.

Young love, as well as long-awaited love, is characterized by haste and seeing one’s partner in “rosy” colors. The virtues that any person has - since everyone is created in the image of God and inherited perfect traits from Him - a loving person perceives exaggeratedly and it seems to him that the object of love is perfect. At the same time, his shortcomings - which everyone also has, since we were all subject to original sin and its consequences in the form of illness, death and passions - seem to be smoothed out and do not lend themselves to rational analysis.

Therefore, in a church where young people have come to talk with the priest about the upcoming event, you can encounter an unexpected reaction from the church minister. So, if the priest observes the charter of the holy fathers and honors traditions, then he will advise lovers to wait at least a year before the wedding, during which time they can get to know the person better in different circumstances and experience their feelings in practice.

At the same time, this year is not blessed to live an intimate life. In the case when the newlyweds came after an established relationship and confronted the priest with a fait accompli, he explained to them that early sexual intimacy before legal marriage leads to unfavorable consequences for future relationships and their strength.

After an explanatory conversation, if the young people have realized their guilt, the priest invites them to fast for three days, then confess their sins and receive communion. On the eve of the wedding, the newlyweds must take communion in order to feel this day as the most important in life - the day when two destinies become one destiny, two souls become one soul and two bodies become one body.

How to prepare for a wedding?

First you need to choose the day and place for the wedding and notify the priest in advance. It must be remembered that not every day of the year the Orthodox Church is allowed to perform this sacrament.

The sacrament of weddings is not performed on Tuesdays and Thursdays, since these days precede fasting, which believers observe on Wednesday and Friday. Also, the sacrament is not performed on Saturday, since Sunday (and the church day begins at 20:00 the day before) is Little Easter, a sanctified day.

You also cannot get married on the days of the fasts established by the Ecumenical Councils - these are 4 fasts a year with a total duration of 5-6 months with different frequencies.

As a rule, in the Orthodox Church of Russia it was established centuries-old tradition weddings on Krasnaya Gorka is the name of the holiday on the first Sunday after Easter. This day is called church calendar Anti-Easter marks the beginning of the period of national wedding festivities, which occurred en masse in Rus' at all times.

The sacrament is also not performed on the eve of single fast days– for example, September 11 on the feast of the Beheading of John the Baptist; V special days joy and celebration after Lent and Advent - on Christmastide and Bright Week; before and during the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross.

After choosing the day, it is necessary to begin preparation, which, first of all, includes not the external preparation of individual items, inviting guests and planning the events of the celebration - but internal state newlyweds, which consists of preparing for the sacrament of Confession and. Both sacraments necessarily precede such important event. After all, the Lord calls the Kingdom of Heaven a wedding feast, and Communion at such a feast on the wedding day is a communion of God’s love and strengthening for the entire future journey together in life.

The priest sets the time for the wedding immediately after the liturgy, which is held every morning. Ideally, if the newlyweds manage to defend the liturgy and receive communion at it immediately on the eve of the celebration. After all, it is much more important to spend your energy on contributing to the sacrament than to save it for evening festivities (which it is advisable to avoid and leave guests as early as possible for privacy).

What do you need for a wedding in a church?

The rules for preparing for a wedding in the Orthodox Church lie mainly in internal awareness and responsibility for this step. In the understanding that there is no turning back and all difficulties of character, adjustments, disagreements cannot now be a reason for dissolving the union that God has sanctified.

This is a serious step, but many today take it frivolously, without calculating the strength and strength of their feelings. Unfortunately, such people do not understand that after the breakup of a married union, it will be more difficult to make the next family harmonious and they should take care of what they have.

And secondly, it is necessary to prepare an outfit, documents, items for the sacrament and other things needed on this day.

What is needed for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, list:

  1. Marriage registration certificate. According to the rules established Holy Synod, marriages not registered with the registry office cannot be married. Such conditions are dictated primarily by the seriousness of the newlyweds’ intentions, because after the revolution and collapse Russian Empire The church has lost the power to influence the rights and obligations of the parties; the function of regulating legal relations is now performed by the registry office.
  2. Icons of the Savior and the Mother of God. What icons are needed for a wedding? Any images and settings will do, but the main thing is that you can pick them up without any problems. This pious tradition used to mean the blessing of parents for marriage and was passed on by inheritance - on the bride’s side an icon of the Most Holy Theotokos, and on the groom’s side an icon of the Savior. The blessing of parents had sacred value and was sacredly observed.
  3. Gold wedding rings. Previously, a woman's wedding ring was silver, recalling that in Christian family a woman is a helper to her husband and submits to her loving spouse. The husband had a gold ring, which corresponded to the symbolism of the royal metal - like Christ, the husband is obliged to love his wife, who symbolizes the Church. It is the husband who will be responsible for his family before God at the Judgment.
  4. Wedding candles. They can be purchased on site at the temple. They are a symbol of the grace of the Holy Spirit, who is invisibly present and sanctifies.
  5. White board. It can be like a regular store-bought towel white, and hand-embroidered fabric by the bride (which was often practiced in the past). Can also be purchased locally at the Temple. It is laid on the floor and raised up at a certain point in the process of the sacrament. The plat symbolizes the purity of thoughts and aspirations of those getting married.
  6. Some churches have a fixed donation amount for the sacrament. The cost must be paid before the sacrament so as not to forget about it after. If there is no fixed fee, then you can leave a voluntary donation after the wedding. It should be remembered that the state does not provide church workers with salaries and their living depends on our donations.
  7. Worthy appearance those getting married. The girl (woman) should have a headdress (scarf or a fuller veil for a wedding), covered shoulders, the outfit should be modest, covering the knees and not have a deep neckline. A man must wear trousers. Shorts, breeches and other shortened options that expose legs are not allowed for men in the temple. It is better to choose light, pastel colors for the bride's dress. Traditionally, a pure, chaste girl emphasizes her innocence with an absolutely white dress and fresh flowers in her hands. It is better to choose comfortable shoes for the bride, with flat soles, so that you can perform the service without any problems.

After the church lost its legitimacy civil force, capable of regulating legal issues, the presence of witnesses is not mandatory and is rather of the nature of a pious tradition. The witnesses were guarantors of the spouses and knew them well. They invited witnesses who were experienced and had their own families, who could give practical advice in difficult situations.

What wedding rules in the Orthodox Church do you need to know?

The priest chosen by the newlyweds to conduct their sacrament will clearly explain how to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church. But general rules remain the same.

A marriage registered by the registry office is a graceless, but not lawless cohabitation. This form is respected by the church and is permitted in cases where a church marriage cannot be performed. But it cannot be accomplished in several cases:

  • when a civil marriage was registered more than three times, according to church canons you cannot marry more than three times;
  • when one or both spouses do not belong to the Orthodox Church, are not baptized, or are not brought in voluntarily;
  • when there was no actual dissolution of marriage with the previous spouse: for civil registration, a divorce certificate is required, for church registration - the blessing of the bishop for entering into a new marriage;
  • when the bride and groom are related by blood or spirituality - including if they are godparents of the same person;
  • The rules for the age of those getting married in the Orthodox Church are limited to the upper threshold of 60 years for a woman and 70 for a man, the lower threshold: 16 years for a girl and 18 for a guy.

During preparation for the wedding, all controversial issues in matters of worldview should be discussed so that the sacrament is performed with a pure heart.

How long does a wedding take in a church? 40-60 minutes.

What to do with wedding candles and other attributes after the wedding?

Of similar family heirlooms You can arrange a small collection. For this purpose, a separate box is created, where attributes are placed after weddings, baptisms and other memorable family events. The box can be shown to children, illuminating for them the details of a significant day, refreshing your own memory and plunging into memories in happy events. You can also place various souvenirs brought from the pilgrimage there.

Wedding candles can be lit during prayer to ask God for something important for the family, for special gratitude to Him, or at other times.

All of these things are reminders of important milestones in the family's development and are part of the emotional life of family members. However, in themselves they do not carry sacred value. If for some reason the relics are no longer needed, they can be eliminated in a special way. Since the items took part in the holy rite, it is better to burn them yourself or hand them over to the church with a request to dispose of the consecrated candles and items that participated in the sacrament.

Seeing the symbols of the wedding in front of them, spouses can, through memories, find ways of mutual understanding, when difficult moments arise, through tangible evidence of their union, which they entered into before God, the spouses remember the importance of the family hearth and draw new strength to go through life together hand in hand. hand.

The rules of weddings in the Orthodox Church consist, first of all, of a moral basis, which consists of purity of intentions, the absence of selfish and dishonest goals and a firm determination to unite with a loved one. The purpose of such a union is to receive from the Lord the gift of like-mindedness for Christian life and raising children. You can learn more about weddings from the book.