Reasons for the development of an inferiority complex. The reasons for the development of this complex may be different.

An inferiority complex is formed when a person is convinced that he does not meet generally accepted standards and norms in any respect. A person feels his own uselessness and inadequacy, comparing himself with a low-quality product that will soon be thrown into a landfill.

Some people experience a feeling of inferiority during a difficult period in life, when they cannot cope with the problem. for a long time. Others feel inadequate all the time. It is not the rational conviction of the superiority of others that prevents us from living fully, but the question “how to get rid of complexes?” can't get it out of my head. A complex person. What is the essence of an inferiority complex and how to get rid of it?

An inferiority complex is the first cause of neuroses. Get rid of ballast and live to the fullest!

Causes and signs of an inferiority complex

The reasons for the inferiority complex lie in childhood. The sensation occurs if a person has physiological deficiencies since childhood. A complex member of society is raised by the parents themselves, which does not allow the child to learn to act and live independently. But the lack of parental attention is fraught with the development of a complex.

One negative situation can sow the seed of an inferiority complex, and a dysfunctional family life, lack of luck, constant criticism and negative suggestions from others will develop this feeling to its maximum extent.

A complex person behaves demonstratively, attracts attention to himself and does not adapt well to society. A person with an inferiority complex is afraid of making mistakes, often because of problems with speech. It is worth noting that it is more difficult to notice signs of an inferiority complex in men than in women. This is explained by the presence in their lives of attributes of success and respectability - expensive cars, a highly paid position, expensive suits.

What is an inferiority complex in reality?

Complexity acts like a thorn. To prevent the unpleasant sensations from a “splinter” from interfering with life, a person puts on a social mask. The superficial image is shown to others, but in reality the person’s personality is diametrically opposed.

An inferiority complex is generated by fears and... A person worries that his superficial image will not withstand the onslaught of the world around him and that he will face his own insecurities face to face. False social masks protect people from their own worthlessness and uselessness. IN advanced cases inferiority complex, a person exhibits all the signs of megalomania, and sometimes -.

In fact, a person with an inferiority complex dreams with all his soul that there will be those people who will accept him along with all his peculiarities and “cockroaches”. He himself wants to accept himself with all his shortcomings in order to stop self-flagellation. A complex person expects praise and approval from others.

Dissolved in the feeling of inferiority, a person will be what is called a failure. He savors unfulfillment and buries himself in it. People with complexes, regardless of status and financial situation.

  • Realize the cause of your feelings of inferiority.

Dig into your memories and determine at what point the development of the complex began. Find in your memory a situation that traumatized you and analyze it. Answer: what emotions did you experience then? What did you think about after an unpleasant situation? How much did the situation affect your feelings and thoughts? How long did you worry about the incident? The complex develops from childhood. Now that you're an adult, it's time to re-evaluate. Write down the negative beliefs you go through life with in a column on a piece of paper. On the contrary, indicate a new positive interpretation negative quality. Suppose that the negative belief that has become the basis of the complex is a lack of appearance (long nose, big ears, scar, etc.). Indicate on the other side of the sheet how this is compensated ( beautiful smile, expressive look, a slim body etc.). Destroy the negative part of the sheet, and re-read the second every day until positive beliefs become the norm for you.

  • Watch your own thinking.

Internal dialogue should take place on a positive note. If thoughts arise in your head, immediately change them to positive or at least neutral ones. Think about your own character, appearance and behavior exclusively from a positive point of view. Without changing your way of thinking, it is impossible to abstract yourself from the complex.

  • Conduct an analysis of your own personality.

All people have strong and weak character traits. Analyze yourself. Knowing your own strengths will help you respond more calmly to the criticism of others. Please note that there should be more positive qualities than negative aspects. If difficulties arise, ask friends and family for help.

  • Acknowledge the negatives.

Ignoring shortcomings will not lead to anything positive. Weak sides character needs to be known and accepted, but there is no need to experience an inferiority complex in this regard. Everyone has unpleasant traits, but only by recognizing them can you overcome the negative aspects.

  • Emphasize character strengths.

Whenever an inferiority complex takes over the situation, remember the positive qualities. Consciously shift your attention to your own strengths. Act persistently and soon you will notice that your self-esteem has increased and the complex has been defeated.

  • Don't take criticism to heart.

Criticism is the subjective judgment of other people and nothing more. There may be some justice in a critical statement that is worth listening to, but do not forget that the opinions of others are not the ultimate truth.

The reason for your inferiority complex is not in what others say, but in your own thoughts about it.

  • Be aware of your own surroundings.

Cheerful and positive people make others optimistic. Communication with them supports you in difficult moments and gives inspiration for new achievements and development of your own life.

  • Don't avoid communicating with people.

Complex people avoid communicating with others. They are reserved and closed. Look fear in the face and don't invent imaginary reasons in an attempt to avoid communication. By following this advice, you will notice that people are quite positive towards you and do not criticize you.

  • Constantly develop yourself.

Engage in physical, intellectual and spiritual development continuously. Learn new things on your own, read books, attend courses and trainings. As you develop, your self-esteem will increase.

  • Find a role model or idol.

A role model can be a person from your inner circle, a character from a book or movie, or a celebrity. Analyze his character traits that attract you. Take on this role periodically and gradually you will notice that the virtues of your idol will become yours over time.

  • Read optimistic literature.

Positive books with a positive plot will set you up for an optimistic wave. After good literature, thoughts are colored in rainbow shades. Books by Anthony Robbins, Anatoly Nekrasov and other authors inspire.

  • Start it.

Record the events of the day, your own achievements and positive moments in a blog. Set aside at least 10 minutes of time daily for this.

Change your own thinking and outlook on life. You will not get rid of feelings of inferiority, complexes and negative thoughts unless you make an effort to do so.

The content of the article:

An inferiority complex is a combination of a person’s emotional and psychological perception of the world around him in a distorted form. It is expressed in a feeling of personal inferiority against the background of the irrational rise above oneself of the majority of representatives of society. When comparing the inner “I” with other people, a person with a similar problem begins to consider himself a defective thing, which subsequently leads to neurosis and even a suicide attempt.

Causes of an inferiority complex

To get rid of the feeling of inferiority, you should listen to the opinion of specialists who see low self-esteem in children and adults in the following provoking factors:

  • Problems in childhood. In this case, we will talk about two sides of the coin, which ultimately lead to a sad result. Parents can either organize overprotection of their children, or completely deprive them of care and attention. In the first case, the child develops an inability to become an independent person, in the second, the makings of a person who is unsure of his abilities are formed.
  • Physical disabilities. The reasons for inferiority complexes often lie in the reluctance to see your face and figure in the mirror. Sometimes this is just a far-fetched problem despite a rather attractive appearance. However, one must take into account the fact that a person may actually have physical defects. Women are usually worried about their appearance, while men are concerned about the size of their penis.
  • Negative influence of society. Some “well-wishers” do not skimp on negative assessments of people with excessive impressionability. Having chosen a similar victim for themselves and created an inferiority complex in her, they thus wish to assert themselves at the expense of others.
  • Criticism of loved ones. If dissatisfaction from strangers can be ignored, then impartial comments from relatives can hurt any person. He begins to think that he is only listening to constructive criticism about his worthlessness.
  • Bad luck. If Fortune constantly deprives people of her attention, then they may consider this a sign of their own inferiority. Compared to more successful acquaintances, a person with a regular black streak in life begins to develop complexes and falls into despair.
  • Negative self-hypnosis. There is a category of people who initially screw themselves up, looking for errors in their own personal and public life. Even if their immediate environment tells them otherwise, they are not able to soberly assess reality and their place in it.
  • Failures in intimacy. Some women after giving birth consider themselves not as attractive as before, and are afraid of losing sexual interest from their loved one. Men, after criticism of their merits from their partner, can acquire an inferiority complex if the size of their reproductive organ was ridiculed.
  • Family problems. Constant scandals and lack of mutual understanding often lead to the fact that one of the spouses begins to subconsciously blame themselves for the events taking place. If there is a significant other in the form of a tyrant, this factor is aggravated because the injured party completely loses his own opinion.
  • Treason. This event a negative plan can cause serious mental trauma to both men and women. The very idea that a loved one has found a partner on the side with a spectacular appearance and more solid sexual experience can even develop an inferiority complex in a self-centered person.
  • Discrimination. It can occur both by gender and by nationality. In some cases, it comes to collective bullying, when the victim begins not only to panic, but makes attempts to commit suicide.
If you do not take into account complexes about your appearance, experts have noticed a certain pattern when the percentage of people with a similar problem increases. In this case, we will talk about unemployment and the decline of the economy, which do not give a person the opportunity career growth and acquiring financial well-being.

Manifestations of an inferiority complex in humans


Such symptoms can be both obvious and hidden. In most cases, signs of an inferiority complex look like this:
  1. Demonstrativeness. All the behavior of a person who considers himself a flawed person is a silent cry for help. By any means he wants to attract attention to himself with obvious fear that his desire will come true.
  2. Alertness. If a person has any complexes, then he will see a catch in any word or deed of the people around him. Contrived sidelong glances, imaginary whispering behind one's back - real events in the minds of such individuals.
  3. Excessive self-criticism. The principle of “attack yourself first” always characterizes people with inferiority complexes. Confident in own strength subjects rarely engage in such activities because they consider themselves accomplished individuals in life.
  4. Lack of faith in the future. The favorite expressions of an insecure person look like the phrases “I can’t”, “this is too difficult for me” and “professionals should deal with such an issue.” At the same time, such people not only express their doubts out loud, but actually do nothing to improve the quality of their own lives.
  5. Diction defects. It should immediately be stated that we are not talking about congenital anomalies of the speech apparatus. Stuttering and slurred speech often appear in a person who finds himself in an alarming situation when communicating with an emotionally stronger provocateur.
  6. Superiority complex. Psychologists call this behavior the syndrome of insecure individuals. Either people with obvious problems in life, or people with a sick psyche try to show their exclusivity. The exception is some children of super-rich parents or oligarchs, for whom feeling like celestials of this world is considered the norm.
  7. Neurotic behavior. Sigmund Freud insisted on the fact that the feeling of guilt is difficult to distinguish from an inferiority complex. The famous psychoanalyst argued that such self-doubt has erotic roots in the development of the problem and subsequently leads to neurosis.
  8. Mirror Hate. This aspect especially concerns women who consider themselves ugly. Men approach this issue much more simply, because they do not consider their appearance the main criterion of attractiveness for beautiful ladies.
  9. Intolerance to compliments. A person who is confident in himself responds adequately to praise for his actions and appearance. A complex person will not accept a single sign of encouragement towards her without a second thought. She will consider this either a manifestation of pity, or an outright mockery of her dignity.

Test to identify your inferiority complex


Before thinking about the need to get rid of such a problem (which may not exist), experts recommend answering the following statements and calculating points:
  1. People do not share my thoughts: most of the time (0), sometimes (3), never (5);
  2. I feel very uncomfortable in the company of others: always (5), depending on the company (3), never (0);
  3. I don’t give in to despondency: yes (5), sometimes (3), never (0);
  4. Being an optimist is: absurd (0), important in a difficult period of life (3), a prerequisite (5);
  5. I want to be as successful as others: yes (0), sometimes (3), I am no worse than others (5);
  6. I have more disadvantages than advantages: definitely (0), the opinion of envious people (3), exactly the opposite (5);
  7. Every moment in life is beautiful: yes (5), general words (3), no (0);
  8. I have a feeling of uselessness: often (0), sometimes (3), never (5);
  9. The motivation for my actions is not clear to people: always (0), sometimes (3), in exceptional cases (5);
  10. Close people criticize me: constantly (0); according to the situation (3); very rarely (5);
  11. I have many positive qualities: definitely (5); there is also negative traits(3), there are none (0);
  12. I realize all my life plans: yes (5); depending on the circumstances (3), too difficult (0);
  13. Everyone is dissatisfied with their appearance: yes (0), this does not apply to me (3), incorrect conclusion (5);
  14. I do not meet the requirements of society: never (5); sometimes (3), always (0);
  15. I even listen to unfair criticism: yes (0), out of politeness (3), I stop the conversation (5).
Results:
  • 0-20 points - an indicator of a clear complex with negative self-esteem and fixation on the existing problem;
  • 21-40 points - a coefficient that indicates complexes that you can get rid of on your own;
  • 41-65 points - problems with self-perception are present, but a person with this indicator copes well with them.
  • 66-75 points - in this case we are talking about a person who is confident in his abilities, but who still should not have inflated self-esteem.

Ways to combat inferiority complex

There are many techniques that allow you to gain confidence in your own abilities. Any person can live happily if he wants to change his attitude towards himself.

Independent actions with an inferiority complex


Psychologists have developed a number effective ways, in which it is realistic to become a self-respecting person:
  1. Correct perception of compliments. You should not look for a catch in every praise, which in fact may not exist. If it is said by an insincere person, it is enough to politely thank him in return and close the topic of conversation.
  2. Self love. It is necessary not only to learn to accept compliments, but also to give them to your reflection in the mirror. In this case, you should not be afraid of turning into a Narcissist, because with an inferiority complex, people of this kind are not in danger.
  3. Evaluating your actions. In this situation, a notebook of achievements will help, which is recommended to be kept daily. Even the smallest breakthrough in a positive direction must be voiced on paper with a detailed description.
  4. Refusal of hermitage. Each person is an individual who should not be hidden from the outside world. You should start attending entertainment events where you can give vent to your emotions.
  5. Conversation with loved ones. If the family supports a person who has an inferiority complex, then you can turn to them for help. The message to your family should look like this: describe my positive qualities. Loving people They won’t say anything that can hurt the soul, so you should take note of their reasoning.
  6. Refusal to compare. The main mistake of a person with complexes is the desire to try on someone else's image. Having become the shadow of other people, you should not hope for the emergence of self-respect for your own person. It is necessary to always and everywhere be yourself, if this remains within the framework of generally accepted morality.
  7. Opening up new perspectives. The fear of being ridiculed at an interview must be forgotten once and for all. You should also not listen to the advice of friends who discourage you from trying your hand at a promising profession.
  8. Playing sports. Some people with an inferiority complex are ashamed of their figure. Consequently, the moment has come when you need to become a visitor to the gym, swimming pool, tennis court and stadium with a treadmill.
  9. Working on the image. In this case, you can trust both your taste and ask a stylist for help. Nothing changes a person's self-esteem like changing his image in a positive direction.
  10. Working on your speech. It’s better to say a sweet absurdity than to mutter word after word in a conversation. It’s quite easy to be considered a bore, so you don’t need to add another complex to yourself. You need to think about what you are talking about, but not get hung up on every phrase.
  11. Positive character. People who openly demonstrate their inhibitions are unlikely to be welcomed in any company or work collective. It is necessary to learn to smile even when you want to become despondent.
  12. Choosing the right friends. Hypocrites and gossips will only aggravate the depressed state of a person who is not confident in himself. You need to communicate with those people who charge you with energy and will not criticize your acquaintances without good reason.
  13. Focus on everything new. You can set yourself a goal to learn 5-10 words from foreign language or get acquainted with the history and culture of any previously unknown countries. After a certain period of time, a person with this problem will understand that he has become a rather erudite person.
It should be remembered that for some people it was an inferiority complex that at one time aroused the desire to achieve everything in life. Such celebrities as Lady Gaga (mockery over her appearance), Christina Aguilera (mockery over the eccentricity of the future singer), Roman Abramovich and Oprah Winfrey (peers’ rejection of the poverty of future billionaires) successfully overcame all difficulties after attacks from the public.

Help from psychologists with an inferiority complex


Not in all cases a person is able to cope with self-doubt on his own. When looking for an answer to the question of how to deal with an inferiority complex, experts can offer the following methods to eliminate the problem:
  • Family therapy. If the reason for the inability to self-realize lies in childhood trauma, then its elimination should be carried out together with the parents. Conversation and family training help quite effectively in this case.
  • "Protective shield" method. Not all people are friendly towards each other. Treatment of inferiority complexes is primarily based on the correct reaction towards envious people. Psychologists teach us to perceive ill-wishers this way and consider their caustic remarks as bad manners and outright stupidity.
  • Method of reification (personification). When communicating with their patient, specialists give him an instruction for dialogue with an inanimate object. You can then hone your oratorical skills during a “discussion” with any household appliance or flower. An excellent solution to self-doubt is to talk to your pet.
  • Psychological training. The patient is asked to divide a sheet of paper into two equal parts. Then he will need to voice his negative and positive character traits on both halves. During the session, the psychologist voices the problem that he has analyzed. After this, the sheet of paper is cut in half to burn or tear into small pieces the entire written negative. Positive reviews about yourself must be placed in the most visible place in the apartment.

Consequences of an inferiority complex


Some people think that it is better to underestimate themselves than to believe in their own prospects. With this attitude towards the problem, some complications in life may arise:
  1. Family breakdown. If the signs of an inferiority complex are pronounced, then this can jeopardize the existence of a couple in marriage. A person who considers himself a useless person will never become a happy family man in the future.
  2. Personality destruction. If the subject does not love his own “I”, then one should not expect respect from other people. Self-flagellation and the search for shortcomings ultimately lead to the fact that a person begins to consider the current situation (in the absence of a desire to analyze it) as a normal phenomenon.
  3. Loneliness. Anyone who doubts his abilities often or violently expresses this or completely withdraws into himself. However, the result is always clear - the loss of friends and acquaintances. If such behavior is additionally accompanied by a superiority complex, then even relatives may lose the trust.
  4. Suicide. With significant mental trauma that has created an inferiority complex, the victim of circumstances can solve his problem in a similar way. If there are no close people nearby, then she will fulfill her plans, because people with such a problem are rarely manipulators.
How to deal with an inferiority complex - watch the video:


To figure out how to get rid of an inferiority complex, you first need to believe in yourself. Without this decision, not a single psychotherapist, who is only able to coordinate his patient, will help. In some cases, you can do without a visit to a specialist if the problem that arises can be solved on your own.

A feeling of inferiority (inferiority complex) as a personality quality is a tendency to show a heightened exaggerated experience of one’s own weakness, inferiority and imperfection, and to irrationally believe in the superiority of others over oneself.

Remember: you are needed! No one is superior and no one is inferior, no one is superior and no one is inferior. Everyone is in the right place. A samurai, a very arrogant warrior, once came to a Zen Master. The samurai was very noble, but, looking at the Master, seeing the beauty of the Master, the beauty of the moment, he suddenly felt somehow insignificant. He said to the Master: - Why do I feel my insignificance? A moment ago everything was fine. As soon as I entered your courtyard, I fell. Never felt this way before. I have faced death many times and never felt fear. Why am I scared now? The master said: - Wait. I'll answer when everyone has left. People came to visit the Master all day, and the samurai got tired of waiting. In the evening, when the room was empty, the samurai asked: “Can you answer me now?” - Come out. It was a full moon and the moon was rising above the horizon. The master said: “Look at these trees, this one, tall to the sky, and this one, small, next to it.” They have both been growing in front of my window for many years, but they have no problems. This small tree never says to the big one: “Why do I feel humiliated in front of you?” This tree is small, and this one is so big, why have I never heard them murmur? The samurai thought about it and answered: “Because they cannot compare.” - See, you don't need to ask me. You know the answer yourself. When you don't compare, all insignificance and all greatness disappears. You are, you are just here. A small bush or a large tree - it doesn’t matter. You are yourself. A leaf of grass is as necessary as the greatest star. This voice of the cuckoo is as great as any Buddha: the world would be less rich if the cuckoo disappeared. Look around. Everything is necessary, and everyone is good together. This is an organic unity, no one is higher and no one is lower, no one is more important, no one is insignificant. All are incomparably unique and necessary. This is the religion of awareness.

Superiority and inferiority are flip sides of each other. Bright dual pair. Psychologists define an inferiority complex as a set of psychological and emotional feelings of a person, expressed in a sense of personal inferiority and an irrational belief in the superiority of others over oneself. An inferiority complex arises due to various reasons, such as: discrimination, mental trauma, one’s own mistakes and failures, etc. An inferiority complex significantly affects a person’s well-being and behavior. It comes from childhood. Comparing oneself with more physically developed peers, calling them names, beating and bullying on their part could form an inferiority complex. Adults have their own problems: excess weight, appearance, low social status, etc.

People with feelings of inferiority can be recognized by the words of the song: “No matter what they do, things don’t work out...”. Failures follow one another: the coconut does not grow, there is no money, your beloved leaves you, your own children are rude. Cherishing their inferiority, they compare themselves with others (naturally, richer, healthier and more successful), and then experience their inferiority. An idealization with a minus sign is formed when compared with a feeling of superiority. People with an inferiority complex need to understand and accept the truth: no one is given the ability to see a complete objective picture of the world. If you tell a child that this color is red, while pointing to green, he will remember and be convinced that green is red. You, like a child, may have false, distorted ideas about the world and yourself. We all live in the kingdom of distorting mirrors. In your distorted view, you are an ugly, bow-legged, darkly embittered type who no one likes, including you. Bright on the face pronounced complex inferiority. You are convinced that the whole world sees you this way. You feel ashamed of yourself in front of the world. It seems to you that people look at you with pity and condemnation. The girls walked by and laughed sarcastically. They whispered something in each other's ears and burst out laughing again. You thought: “Look, what kind of freak got into our garden?” In fact, girls are interested in how you react to them. And they laugh to somehow attract your attention.

Sudha Chadhran, a modern Indian classical dancer, stopped dancing at the height of her career because doctors were forced to amputate her right leg. After she was given a prosthesis, she returned to dancing, and again became the best among the dancers. When asked how she managed it, she simply answered: “You don’t need legs to dance!”

In general, do not delude yourself that someone thinks about you. Everyone has their own concerns. Everyone thinks about their own person. Are you very concerned about the appearance of others and acquaintances? Some husbands don't recognize their wives on the street. It turns out that you have inserted lenses that present the world in a dark light. This is, of course, an allegory. In fact, you see yourself and the outside world through the prism of the beliefs recorded in your subconscious. And they may be far from true. So it turns out that “life is a deception with enchanting melancholy. That’s why she is so strong, That with her rough hand she writes fatal letters.” Everything you have imagined for yourself is an illusion and deception. The only trouble is that such thoughts about yourself will form an image corresponding to them. You, as a talented actor, will play a bow-legged, darkly embittered type. What do you want? What's inside is also outside. By the way, you the world you will see “bow-legged” in gloomy and embittered tones and you will attribute to him what is characteristic of you.

If you are uncomfortable with your own inferiority or sense of superiority, you will unconsciously project these qualities onto others. I have no desire to bombard my soul. It is easier to find a scapegoat and label him as inferior or superior. Therefore, when you notice that you are being accused of qualities that you definitely do not have, be wary and take a closer look at the accuser. Surely, just as you project “bow-leggedness” onto the world, he puts together a picture of the world from the puzzles of his inferiority or superiority complex. People themselves, covered with many ulcers, look out for other people's blisters.

I was somehow lucky enough to hear an interesting story. Father needed something to do little son, but there were no toys at hand. He took the old one political map peace, tore it into pieces and told his son: “Put it back.” A couple of minutes passed, and the son presented the initial version of the map. The amazed father asked: “How did you do it?” The kid replied: “On the back of the card there was a portrait of a person. I thought that if the person is okay, then everything will be okay with the world.” A wise remark, isn't it?

What are our illusions about ourselves and the world based on? Maybe you attach excessive significance and importance to your appearance? Maybe those around you don’t see it at all. It's not interesting or important to them. Take away your sense of self-importance and you will become invulnerable. The Eskimos use more than eighty words for the word "snow". Snow is so important to them that they come up with dozens of names for it. Appearance is as important to you as snow is to Eskimos. Importance is the shield of the weak. Be careful that life doesn't consider you so important that it won't come for a visit.

The game of our subconscious viral programs is not at all harmless. Our false ideas about ourselves and the world produce real confirmation of this. You don’t like your own weight – obesity is on the rise; you are oppressed by indecision and shyness - an inferiority complex grows like bamboo. Your crime is only in your head, but the punishment is here. Please, you will receive it as you ordered.

Until you eliminate the excessive significance and importance of something for yourself, it will constantly overtake you and grow. Live in a country of “it doesn’t matter.” Eliminating significance is even more important to you than forgiveness. We can forgive offense, anger, aggression, hatred, revenge. But in order to forgive, you must first be offended, that is, give it significance. If this is not significant for you, then there is no need to be offended. Live in such a way that you don't need to forgive. Where there is no significance, there is no resentment or anger.

Your task is not to fight your shortcomings in any way (this will strengthen them even more), but to establish in your subconscious new positive beliefs about yourself and the world around you. Ignore your shortcomings. There are no people without shortcomings. Focus on the strengths you have and want to have. Everything remains the same. Only the azimuth of your attention has changed. You are now focusing on your strengths. If you want to become slim and determined, imagine yourself in a freeze frame or clip in the appropriate form. It all depends on how you imagine a determined person. Typically, a decisive person is characterized by open emotional speech without hints or softened statements. He doesn't whisper or mumble. He boldly expresses his opinion, without looking back at how his opponents will perceive him. He speaks specifically and definitely. In his speech the words “I”, “me”, “mine” are constantly heard, that is, he takes responsibility. A decisive person does not underestimate his own capabilities, his knowledge and personal qualities, and is able to improvise.

So, you have created an image of a slender and determined person in a still frame or in a video clip. Fill the still frame or clip with your feelings and emotions. With each mental review, detail them. Periodic viewing is not stupid looking at an imaginary image. You will involuntarily be attracted to the image by your behavior. You will get used to the role of a decisive person. Over time, the role and your present will merge into complete correspondence. Looking through your real photos and comparing with a still frame or a clip, you will not find any differences. Just remember the gradual process of metamorphosis. If, when you step on the scale, you see the inscription “get off alone,” you don’t need to immediately paint yourself an ideal picture in which you are 50 kilograms younger. Everything in moderation and gradually. To get rid of an inferiority complex, you need, first of all, to stop comparing yourself with more successful, healthy and rich people, and then become despondent. You need to live in the “here and now” mode without devaluing everything you have. Set positive goals for yourself. Replace the old negative attitudes of your subconscious with new, life-affirming ones. Hunt for joy in your world.

Another tip: don’t worry about your importance and you will have it. All people are busy every day proving their importance and significance. Everyone does this in their own ways, techniques and methods. The desire to demonstrate your positive qualities, to strengthen your importance is stupid vanity. If you consciously refuse to cast your importance, your loved ones and acquaintances will understand with a sixth sense that your authority does not need confirmation. You will feel the respect and sympathy of others. As a result, you yourself will be filled with the conviction that you are a worthy person. You will have a similar state with A. Pushkin when he completed work on “Boris Godunov”. In a letter to Vyazemsky, he wrote: “My tragedy is over; I reread it out loud, alone, and clapped my hands and shouted, oh yes Pushkin! Oh yes Son of a bitch ! As a result, your self-esteem will increase, and your inferiority complex will tell you to live a long time.

Petr Kovalev 2013

The concept of an inferiority complex stems from psychology. It is often used in everyday speech to refer to depressed people with low self-esteem. Everyday and scientific concepts are intertwined, so in some ways they are similar, but there are also some differences between them. The first to describe this psychological phenomenon was

What is a “complex” in psychology?

Despite the fact that in everyday life the word “complex” in relation to a person has a very negative connotation, in psychology everything is somewhat different. This term refers to a set of attitudes, mechanisms and sensations that are formed around one specific affect. They influence life and personal development.

Basically, these processes take place at the subconscious level, even if they were formed at the conscious level. When a certain object (thought) is in the zone of consciousness, we can control and manipulate it. If this something goes into the subconscious zone, then it begins to control us. Therefore, complexes influence our lives without our consent. Affect in this case is called an emotion or emotional process.

"Gift" from childhood

Unlike talents and abilities that are given to us from birth, an inferiority complex is an acquired thing. As a rule, the reason or environment for its acquisition is society. Do not forget that a family is also a society.

Most often, the whole bunch of negative self-destructive attitudes are born after the thoughtless words of parents or peers. It is worth adding that for a normally developing, thinking child, the words of an adult are the constitution. Until the age of 10-11, children are guided by their elders, then by their peers.

One word from a mother - “sloppy”, “ugly” or “stupid” - said to her child is equivalent to the cry of a crowd.

A word attached to a person is a seed that may not germinate for several years, but sits tightly in the subconscious. At the slightest favorable conditions it will make itself known. And that's just one word.

What to say about those cases when such statements are part of everyday communication. If you call a person a pig a hundred times, on the hundred and first he will grunt. The inferiority complex in men, as well as in women, is formed from childhood.

Denying your desires

Our entire existence is driven by our desires. In newborns they are simpler and more primitive. The older a child gets, the more complex his desires and needs become.

Wants provoke certain emotions, which activate our body and give strength to fulfill them. Initially, for any creature, personal desires are a priority. And while they move a person, he is controlled by them more than by everything else.

A child who has clearly defined needs is more likely to listen to them than to the advice of adults. At this moment, parents lose control over their child. In order not to bother themselves with thinking about why this happened, they simply pull the rug out from under their feet with one phrase: “Oh, what a bad boy (girl) you are.”

Sometimes this is formulated through the hint that your desires are worthless, they are irrelevant, too expensive, stupid, wrong.

Think about what the following phrases can lead to: “your hands are from the same place,” “you’re worthless,” “it would be better if I didn’t give birth to you,” “only a stupid person can do that,” etc.

What does devaluing desires lead to?

It cannot be said that all children’s whims should be fulfilled without complaint by parents, adults or peers. This also provokes personalities. But if you respond to every “I want” with a sharp refusal, complete with reproaches, screams, condemnation or classic ignoring, this will lead to the person growing up, but the personality in him will not, because the core that feeds on the desires and ambitions of the individual, initially broken.

It cannot be said that such a person has no future or hope for “healing.” We’ll talk about what exactly can change the mechanisms and settings below.

Devaluation of the desires and needs of the individual leads to low self-esteem and an inferiority complex. If a person’s desires are equated to zero, then he feels like a nobody.

How it manifests itself

Signs of an inferiority complex can be either pronounced or latent (hidden).

Sometimes one glance at a person is enough to understand whether he is satisfied with life or not. may be as follows: a person slouches, tilts his head all the time, speaks slurred, stutters when speaking, crosses his arms over his chest all the time, etc.

But sometimes an inferiority complex is hidden behind a bright mask of liberation, brilliance and gloss.

This problem can manifest itself in two ways. On the one hand, there is a fear of people, especially strangers, and on the other, a constant search for new acquaintances.

Since people with an inferiority complex feel worse than others, they need regular approval of their actions from others. This is easier to achieve from people you don’t know well.

Feelings of worthlessness may be accompanied by constant talking about one's imperfections or obsessive bragging. It depends on what compensation mechanism a person chooses.

An example of an inferiority complex can be a whole wardrobe of things from fashionable world brands, expensive cars or other deliberate status symbols, or a retreat into marginality. The latter is manifested by integration into a subculture, actions contrary to society.

People with this complex regularly have a self-condemnation program. Going into marginality provides an opportunity to cling to a less successful society, in which you can begin to condemn everyone else and thus assert yourself.

Departure into various deviations (both positive and negative) can also be considered a sign of an inferiority complex. Drug addiction, alcoholism and smoking are a desire to join society and not be a black sheep.

Forecasts

How to get rid of an inferiority complex? Unfortunately, it is impossible to recover completely from this psychological illness, since there is always a risk that self-flagellation mechanisms are activated when encountering an irritant. But you can muffle it, compensate or get rid of the cause.

Compensation brings only temporary satisfaction or no satisfaction at all. All actions are performed for the public, and not for oneself. The person still considers himself worse than others. At the same time, he does everything so that those around him do not suspect it, wastes his energy and receives only momentary joy.

Compensation

An inferiority complex in women, like men, is accompanied by self-flagellation and an inability to listen to one’s personal desires. This can be compared to a tasteless salad that you buy because its photo looks beautiful on Instagram.

“I want to lose weight so that I can feel more at ease” and “I want to lose weight so that I won’t be considered fat” are completely different things. In the first case you fulfill your desires, and in the other - society. In the same way, “I want to drive quickly and comfortably” and “I want a Mercedes” are two different topics. The first is self-satisfaction, the second is working for status.

Humiliation of others can also be considered compensation. Often people with an inferiority complex, in order to feel normal, do their best to look for flaws in others. Usually the range of searches is limited to those traits and characteristics that these people themselves possess. So, a stupid person will look for narrow-mindedness, an absent-minded person will look for absent-mindedness, a bow-legged person will look for bow-leggedness, a sloppy person will look for sloppiness, etc. And whoever looks for it always finds. By emphasizing this flaw in another, a person temporarily feels complete.

Working on shortcomings

You can get rid of an inferiority complex by coping with a personal (internal) reason or changing your attitude towards it.

If you feel worthless after you didn’t talk about the Pythagorean Theorem, all you need to do is learn it. If this is due to a long nose, then correcting the situation is much more difficult.

All external flaws that people look for in themselves can be corrected. In extreme cases, plastic surgery will help. Therefore, there is no need to torment yourself by savoring the mistakes nature made when creating your image.

Lifestyle change

Sometimes, to get rid of an inferiority complex, it is enough to change the environment or society. If it arose in a circle of certain people (be it family, classmates, friends or colleagues), then in this environment it will either doze or seethe, but will not disappear.

You need to make a huge effort to change yourself and change your attitude towards yourself at the same time. This is why many people get rid of their inferiority complex by leaving their family or changing their place of residence.

You need to remove yourself for some time from the sight of those people who provoke the development of complexes in you, and at the same time change yourself. This disrupts the usual mechanisms that operate in response to a stimulus.

However, returning to often again triggers the hated mechanisms.

Cultivating self-esteem

This strategy is chosen by strong-willed people. If I didn’t know math well at school, I’ll go to study to become a math teacher (“I’ll prove to everyone that I know this subject”). You can give many examples of compensation: “I moved poorly - I’ll become a dancer,” “I was afraid to leave my mother - I’ll become a traveler.” It’s not life, but complete compensation for such people, but passion helps get rid of the cause of the inferiority complex. Such people often become highly qualified specialists.

No lies!

As a rule, people with an inferiority complex are accustomed to lying or fantasizing. These may be trifles that do not bring any benefit, but are aimed at hiding one’s low self-esteem. There are a lot of examples of such petty lies: a girl who touches up her appearance in Photoshop, a guy who tells how he drove “his” car.

At the same time, these people are very honest in global issues. If you are experiencing these symptoms, getting rid of them may be the key to solving the problem.

Which lies in a person’s persistent confidence in his own inferiority as an individual. Ph.D. was discovered by A. Adler, who studied the forms of compensation that develop in children with defects in organic development. Adler first considered their feeling of inferiority as a consequence of a defect, then as a universal driving force of personality development, and even later as a consequence of frustration of the need to overcome unfavorable circumstances. The inability to compensate for a defect or cope with a life situation and thereby overcome the feeling of one’s own inferiority entails the latter’s development into K. n.


Brief psychological dictionary. - Rostov-on-Don: “PHOENIX”. L.A. Karpenko, A.V. Petrovsky, M. G. Yaroshevsky. 1998 .

Inferiority complex

(low value complex)

The syndrome leading to neurotic deviations is psychopathological, which consists in a person’s persistent confidence in his own inferiority as an individual. It was discovered by A. Adler, who studied the forms of compensation that develop in children with defects in organic development. He first considered their feeling of inferiority as a consequence of a defect, then as a universal driving force of personality development, and even later as a consequence of frustration of the need to overcome unfavorable circumstances. The inability to compensate for a defect or cope with a life situation and thus overcome the feeling of one’s own inferiority entails the development of the latter into an inferiority complex. The “feeling of inferiority” that is formed in early childhood is caused by the natural experience for every child of a feeling of personal insufficiency arising from various unfavorable circumstances. external conditions, and has an exceptional influence on the formation and entire life activity of the individual. Later, this feeling is repressed into the unconscious, due to which it is given the character of constant insatiability. The desire for a positive experience of a sense of competence - for self-affirmation (socialization) among other people - stimulates different kinds activities in which real or imaginary success is possible. The individual tries to overcome - “compensate” for - inferiority by simulating creative possibilities and thus sometimes achieves exceptional results (overcompensation). S. Freud sometimes also used this concept, but did not recognize such an exceptional role for it. According to the French writer Jean Dutour, the worst thing about an inferiority complex is that it is not the people who should have it.


Dictionary practical psychologist. - M.: AST, Harvest. S. Yu. Golovin. 1998.

Inferiority complex Etymology.

Comes from Lat. complexus - combination.

Author. Category.

A theoretical construct of individual psychology designed to explain human activity.

Specificity.

It denotes the energy potential of mental activity caused by each person’s experience in early childhood of a feeling of personal insufficiency. In this case, this feeling is repressed into the unconscious and, due to this nature, gives it constant insatiability. The desire for a positive experience of a sense of competence stimulates various types of activities in which real or imaginary success is possible.

Synonym.

Feelings of inferiority.


Psychological Dictionary. THEM. Kondakov. 2000.

Inferiority complex

   INFERIORITY COMPLEX (With. 311) - a heightened, exaggerated experience of one’s own weakness and imperfection. One of key concepts individual psychology of Alfred Adler, to whom this term belongs. The concept is widely used in everyday speech in a not entirely adequate meaning. In this case, as a rule, it is meant that a person does not value himself highly and suffers from self-doubt. This phenomenon, which actually occurs quite often, would be more accurately defined in terms of low self-esteem. However, in Adler's view, the content of an inferiority complex is not identical to low self-esteem or, at least, is not exhausted by it.

Adler formulated his concept of inferiority, initially based on the results of a study of children suffering from various physical defects. He believed that a physical defect gives rise to a natural feeling of one’s own imperfection and inferiority; At the same time, the child has a desire to overcome and compensate for the defect, and it is precisely the desire for compensation that is driving force development. This idea was creatively rethought and developed by LS Vypotsky (although Vygotsky’s references to Adler are few, his influence can be traced quite clearly), who laid the foundations of Russian defectology; one of the central principles in Vygotsky’s defectological concept is the principle of defect compensation.

Subsequently, Adler extended his ideas to all children, including those not burdened with physical defects. He believed that a child who is still small, weak and inept in comparison with adults is thereby already doomed to feel inferior. Man, unlike animals, is born weak, defenseless and helpless, that is, from the moment of birth he constantly experiences insufficient strength and limited capabilities.

It is extremely important, however, that for Adler the idea of ​​inferiority is not identical to pathology. He wrote: “Feelings of inferiority are not in themselves something painful or abnormal. They are the cause of all improvements in the condition of mankind."

In individual psychology, feelings of inferiority are viewed as general condition human existence. It is inherent in all people without exception from birth. While not a mental disorder, it, on the contrary, contributes to the healthy development of a person and his achievement of success in life.

Feeling dissatisfied with his weakness, a person intensifies his activities - he strives to compensate for the shortcomings he has from birth, overcome his inferiority, and assert himself in life. Weighed down by his imperfections, he does everything to become more perfect. In this regard, the feeling of inferiority is a stimulus for the development of one’s life activity and becomes the driving force behind a person’s socially useful activity.

There are examples from history when the desire to overcome one's inferiority led to outstanding results. Thus, Demosthenes, who suffered from speech defects from birth, thanks to his desire to cope with the disease, became the greatest orator. Or, for example, legendary commander Suvorov - as a child he was extremely weak and sickly, but at the cost of dedicated exercise he managed to achieve exceptional physical stamina and endurance.

At the same time, it is quite obvious that the painful experience of one’s own inferiority can give rise to a person’s lack of self-confidence, which does not at all contribute to his social adaptation and creates numerous problems. And at any age. On this occasion, Adler aptly remarked: “In their dreams, children express their ambitions. Most of their fantasies begin with the words “when I grow up”... There are many adults who also live as if they have not yet grown up.”

Exacerbation of feelings of inferiority can lead to pathological manifestation of this feeling. That is, according to Adler, it is not the inferiority itself that is decisive, but the strength and nature of its perception by a person. If feelings of inferiority begin to dominate mental life human, painting it in negative emotional tones, a person loses the ability to positively develop his creative powers and talents. Not feeling the strength to truly compensate for the deficiency, he chooses perverted compensatory paths. This is the pathological nature of the inferiority complex.

In the ordinary mind, a person suffering from an inferiority complex appears as a timid, shy creature, prone to despondency and self-flagellation. According to Adler's observations, the manifestations of this disorder are completely different. The flip side of an inferiority complex is often the so-called superiority complex - a person strives by all means to rise above other people in order to thereby compensate for his inferiority; Arrogance, arrogance and self-satisfaction take over in him. The means of achieving superiority are usually all kinds of social symbols - material and status. To compensate for his complex, a person can strive to enrich himself, emphasizing in every possible way the importance of money as a measure life success, or to the acquisition of all kinds of titles and high positions, allowing him, despite his modest abilities, to assert his superiority over others. So unbridled careerism, the pursuit of tools and symbols of power (one of which, quite obviously, is human society money) in many cases are not so much a manifestation of strength as a symptom of weakness. It is typical that all kinds of guides to getting rich and achieving success in life, instructions on manipulating people are the favorite reading of losers. So the arrogant nouveau riche, who considers everyone who is not as rich as him to be beggars, and the tyrant boss, and the titled narcissist, whose business card densely dotted with his high-profile titles, and a domestic tyrant, tormenting loved ones with his nagging - all of them are most often victims of the notorious complex.

Another manifestation of an inferiority complex may be the desire for one’s own exclusivity by opposing oneself to others, leaving a full-fledged social life- “into oneself” or into a closed caste of the same notorious individuals. For a psychologist, it is obvious that the majority of adherents of all kinds of exotic teachings and delusional theories are weak, helpless people who do not know how to assert themselves in ways accepted in society. Contrasting themselves with the “uninitiated” helps them to imbue them with an illusory sense of their superiority and thereby overcome the oppressive feeling of their worthlessness.

An inferiority complex can also be expressed in exaggeration, emphasizing one’s weakness, even to the point of “flight into illness.” Desperate to achieve recognition from others, unable to support his self-esteem with real successes and achievements, a person sometimes begins, paradoxically, to revel in his failures, defeats and even illnesses. Moreover, he can unconsciously provoke the occurrence of various painful symptoms in order to at least in this way attract attention and evoke the compassion of loved ones.

According to Adler, neurosis develops on the basis of an inferiority complex. When faced with intractable problems, a neurotic does not try to solve them and avoids constructive activity. He finds or creates his own own field activities in an imaginary world. Thanks to various tricks, the neurotic achieves “success” in this imaginary world, which allows him to feel like an outstanding person. He surrenders to the power of delusions of grandeur, forcing those around him to reckon with their whims, focusing only on his own - mostly perverted - ideas and ignoring those of others.

Alfred Adler

Adler believed that the origins of the inferiority complex should be sought in childhood. In his opinion, the emergence of a complex is provoked, firstly, of course, by natural organic imperfection and weakness (children with all kinds of disorders here, in fact, turn out to be the most vulnerable), and secondly, by defects in education, of two kinds. Both hypocare, a lack of attention and educational influence on the part of parents, and hypercare—excessive attention and care—can lead to an aggravation of feelings of inferiority. And since a rare family manages to achieve a golden mean between these two extremes, the emergence of an inferiority complex in the emerging personality is a very likely prospect.

The goal of psychotherapy according to Adler is to rid a person of the destructive consequences of an exaggerated sense of inferiority. Thanks to treatment aimed at correcting errors in upbringing, a person’s sense of community with other people (“public interest”) is awakened. Refusal of perverted ways of compensating for inferiority, the emergence of a desire for self-affirmation through well-deserved encouragement by others of a person’s real merits and achievements means movement in the direction of mental health.

Nowadays, when the cult of individualism foolishly borrowed from outside is being obsessively propagated, many people are wary of the very concept of “public interest” introduced by Adler. And it would not be out of place to listen to his words, which have not lost their relevance to this day: “A person who is not interested in his fellow men experiences the greatest difficulties in life and causes the greatest harm to those around him. It is among such people that losers appear.”


Popular psychological encyclopedia. - M.: Eksmo. S.S. Stepanov. 2005.

See what an “inferiority complex” is in other dictionaries:

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