How to behave at a church wedding. Orthodox wedding ceremony

Despite the fact that church marriage is not mandatory in Russia and the CIS countries, many couples decide to take this important step. And if some families sincerely want to marry in heaven as a sign of confirmation of pure love and faith in God, then others simply follow fashion, including the sacrament in the wedding plan.

For whatever reason you decide to get married, the wedding portal site reminds you: be sure to follow the church rules for preparing for the sacrament!

Before the wedding: will there be a sacrament?

Before you begin preparing for your wedding, you need to find out whether the church will allow your couple to get married in a church ceremony. After all, there are prescribed taboos to the ritual.

The wedding will not take place if:

If at least one of the above points occurs, alas, the church will not be able to bless your union.

Are there any obstacles to the sacrament? Then we offer you a little instruction in preparing for the wedding:

Wedding ceremony in Orthodox Church is carried out only if the couple has officially formalized the relationship. It doesn’t matter whether you decide to seal your union directly on the day of the celebration or years later, the church may ask you to provide a marriage certificate.

Confession and Communion before the wedding

The decision to get married should not be made spontaneously. Everyone in a couple must be sincerely confident in their intentions. Important role dedicated to the purification of the soul through prayers, Confession and Communion.

Maximum detailed information The church will definitely tell you how to prepare for the rituals. Do not hesitate to ask questions, because this will help avoid awkward situations directly during the rituals.

Before Communion and Confession, one should fast. During three days the newlyweds read prayers (the priest will tell you which ones), attend evening services, and refuse to sexual relations. Eggs, meat and dairy products will have to be excluded from food.. All this must be observed before the preparatory rites for the wedding.

One of the main tasks of the church is to help a person improve his own soul. Church teachings call to get rid of evil thoughts, empty and swear words, accept everything humbly and calmly.

As a rule, Confession and Communion take place immediately before the wedding. But this is not mandatory requirement. The bride and groom can attend church the day before and separately.

Every church ceremony is aimed at healing the human soul. And if you really decide to seal your relationship with a Church marriage, then both should want this. And the groom. And the bride.

The portal Svadbaholik.ru advises only those couples who are confident in the strength and purity of love in the family to go to church. This may take years, even decades of married life. But only then will you be able to fully appreciate the depth and significance of the sacrament of marriage. And you will treat the question of how to prepare for a wedding with maximum responsibility.

A wedding in a church is a sacred rite of the seven sacraments, during which the lover transfers himself, his desires, thoughts and aspirations into the hands of his beloved. A church wedding imposes obligations to protect the family, which each spouse is obliged to fulfill. In the church, young people receive a blessing for a happy family life and procreation. Church wedding rules have no legal force, so their compliance depends only on the spouses. This is the duty to preserve the sacred bonds of marriage, avoiding the influence of vain passions that destroy love - the spiritual basis of the family. Cost of a wedding in a church varies from city to city. IN major cities, such as Moscow, St. Petersburg, Kazan and other capitals of Russian regions price of wedding in church slightly higher than in small towns.

Church wedding, rules

It must be said that what do you need for a church wedding. As a rule, modern wedding rites allow the presence of relatives and friends. Parental blessing is no longer required what do you need for a wedding it was several centuries ago. Since the fourth century, marriage was not considered legal without parental approval.

The ritual consists of two stages. The first is the betrothal, and the second is the wedding itself. At the betrothal, the deacon brings out wedding rings on a tray. The priest hands the newlyweds candles. The priest puts one wedding ring on ring finger right hand the groom, and then the newlyweds exchange rings three times, symbolizing that they surrender themselves to each other's power.

Now it's time for the wedding. The priest marks the crowns of the bride and groom and gives them to kiss the images of the Savior and Holy Mother of God. The sacrament of wedding means that the newlyweds become king and queen for each other. After this, the newlyweds can return to the house, where their parents greet them with bread and salt, blessing the marriage with icons.

What needs to be done before the wedding?

It's worth talking about what to do before the wedding. First of all, it is necessary to start the wedding sincerely and purely before each other. Honesty and frankness are the key to strong family ties. Only then will the wedding be performed for the good of the soul, and all the prayers offered in the temple will bring good gifts. Previously, only those who had maintained chastity were allowed to get married, and today the Church demands repentance from those who sinned before marriage. After communion and confession before the priest, you can undergo the ceremony.

We should also not forget that a wedding without faith is unlikely to be beneficial. Unfortunately, in modern world A wedding is often just a tribute to fashion, losing holiness and sacrament.

The first thing you need to do before the wedding is choose the place and time for the ceremony. Many churches allow you to make an appointment in advance. If this is not possible, you can issue a receipt for the ceremony to be performed on the wedding day. In this case, it is impossible to determine the exact time, but you can arrange for a specific priest to perform the wedding, which is very important for many couples.

When and how to hold a wedding?

According to the canons of the Russian Orthodox Church, weddings cannot be held during Lent. Easter week, on Christmastide, as well as on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. Accordingly, the calendar of days allowed for the ritual changes every year. It is better to check the date in advance in the temple, church shop or on Internet resources.

On the eve of the wedding, from midnight you cannot eat anything, you cannot drink or smoke, and abstain from sexual relations. In the church, the newlyweds partake of the Holy Mysteries, confess and pray. After this, you can change into your wedding clothes. So, what do you need for a wedding:

• comfortable shoes that are easy to stand in for several hours at a time;
• headdress for the bride;
• pectoral crosses for newlyweds;
• wedding rings, which should be given to the priest in advance so that he can consecrate them by placing them on the Throne. Previously, the wife's ring was silver and the husband's ring was gold. Gold symbolized the sun, whose light was the husband in the family, and silver symbolized the moon, the wife, shining in the reflected light of the sun. For modern weddings, as a rule, they buy identical rings;
• a piece of white linen (or a towel) on which the newlyweds will stand.

What else you should know about the wedding ceremony:

• parents and relatives should come, if not to the liturgy, then at the beginning of the wedding;
• Every married couple must have best men - witnesses who hold crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. As a rule, groomsmen are young, strong, baptized men;
• Photography and video filming in the church is prohibited; it is better to limit yourself to one general photo on the street in front of the church after the ceremony.

The cost of a church wedding may vary if a couple wants to get married separately from the other newlyweds getting married on that day. On weekdays this probability is usually less than on weekends. Also, the price increases if this is not the first marriage for one of the spouses. In any case, it is better to go to the church in advance and find out what the price of a wedding in a church is.

The Orthodox Church attaches importance to the sacrament of weddings special meaning: after all, it was through this rite that marriages were previously concluded; in earlier times, the wedding had legal force and was carried out without fail. Now priests perform the ceremony only after the newlyweds officially register their marriage in government agencies.

It may seem to some that the Sacrament of Wedding has lost its significance, but we are inclined to think that now people are given the opportunity to take this step consciously, and not under pressure. Walking to the altar, the bride and groom should already understand the full spiritual power of the ceremony - after all, this is God’s blessing for living together, giving birth and raising descendants according to the laws of the Christian faith.

There are several wedding rules that the bride and groom must follow. First of all, you need to know that the sacrament itself includes 4 stages: betrothal, wedding, permission of crowns and prayer service. Previously, engagement could take place before the wedding, it was combined with a social engagement, but now fewer and fewer couples adhere to this scheme, so four rituals are included in the wedding.

How does the wedding ceremony take place?

Before the ceremony begins, the priest needs to give the wedding rings - he will consecrate them and place them next to the altar. The groom buys gold and silver ring, after the exchange of which the gold remains with the bride, and the silver remains with her husband. During the Sacrament, the newlyweds hold wedding candles or icons; they are also consecrated in advance. The best men (witnesses) hold the crowns over the heads of the newlyweds; this procedure will take more than half an hour and is tedious, so it is better to select tall witnesses. The presence of all guests in the church is not necessary, but if you want to invite someone, explain that women should come in a skirt and with their heads covered, and men should wear formal trousers and a shirt.

Previously, the groom arrived at the church earlier and waited there for his bride to arrive, but now the newlyweds arrive at the same time. They stop near the main gate of the temple and are escorted to the altar by a priest. The bride must stand left hand from his betrothed. The priest comes out through the royal doors (the middle doors in the iconostasis), in his hands is the holy cross and the Gospel, he is dressed in festive clothes. Then the candles are brought out, the priest blesses the newlyweds three times and gives them burning wedding candles - this is a symbol of love and fidelity in marriage. After each blessing, the young people must cross themselves three times and then accept the candles from the hands of the priest.

To make it more convenient for the bride to hold the candle, the bouquet should be given to one of her friends or not taken to church at all. After presenting the candles, the deacon reads prayers for the newlyweds, blesses their union and descendants, asks for the fulfillment of their requests and the salvation of souls. After this, the priest picks up the rings lying on the throne, this is a symbol of an inextricable union. They are placed according to right side throne: on the right is the groom's ring, on the left - the bride's. First, the priest puts the ring on the groom three times and puts it on his ring finger, then he puts the ring on the bride’s finger. After the blessing, the spouses exchange rings three times - this is the engagement stage.

The wedding takes place in the central part of the temple, where the engaged newlyweds follow the priest. The priest asks questions whether there are any obstacles to the performance of the Sacrament, whether the young people came to church of their own free will. The reading of prayers begins again, crowns are placed on the heads of the couple, they have three symbolic meanings - this is kingship (that is, honor and glory to man, as the crown of God's creation), the crowns of martyrs, this is a symbol of the martyrdom of spouses who struggle with their selfishness every day in marriage , as well as crowns that open the way to the Kingdom of God - a pious life will lead the young there. After the wedding, the spouses are considered as such before God.

After the wedding, a cup is brought into the temple, which is filled with wine - this is a symbol of joys and hardships family life. It is as if the spouses take an oath to fight difficulties and share happiness in half. The spouses drink the wine three times, in small sips, after which the priest leads them around the lectern and stops them near the Royal Doors, giving the last parting words. After this, the wedding ceremony is considered completed, and friends and relatives can congratulate the couple. The duration of the ceremony is from 40 minutes to an hour, this must be taken into account if you have invited older people to the celebration - benches or chairs must be set up for them in a timely manner. In many churches, video and photography are not prohibited, but it is worth knowing that it should not interfere with the work of the priest or interrupt the ceremony. Young people and churches come out to the sounds of the church choir and the ringing of bells.

How to dress for a wedding?

Of course, the sacrament of Wedding is an extraordinary event, but there are certain canons that cannot be violated. The bride's dress should be modest, without back or deep neckline, legs and arms should be covered. Color - white, beige, blue and others light shades, you cannot get married in black, purple or blue dress, and acidic shades will simply be inappropriate. The bride's head is covered with a special veil, and a scarf or hat can be worn.

Avoid overly fluffy veils, as they can catch fire from candles. If you are getting married immediately after the ceremony at the registry office, you should take care of a special cape on the dress that will cover open hands and shoulders, you can also hide them with long gloves. An outfit with a train would also be appropriate - it is believed that the longer the train of a wedding dress, the happier the life of the spouses will be. Shoes should be comfortable, with low heels, because you will have to stand for at least 40 minutes.

The groom must wear a formal suit and comfortable shoes; it is advisable that the newlyweds wear crosses, since only baptized people can get married.

Preparation for the wedding

As a rule, each church has its own rules, so it is advisable to go to the chosen temple in advance and clarify all the points. Having chosen a date, consult with the priest - after all, even if you have calculated everything, it may turn out that this day falls on a temple or religious holiday, in which the wedding is not held.

The church also recommends preparing spiritually for the sacrament: spouses must observe a seven or ten day fast and take communion in advance. You need to have a towel or cloth with you white, on which the newlyweds will stand during the ceremony, a marriage certificate, rings, a bottle of red wine, and candles can also be bought in the temple. If icons are needed, they are purchased and illuminated in advance; as a rule, this responsibility is assigned to the parents.

What should you consider if you want to get married?

The sacrament of wedding is carried out according to church calendar and is agreed upon in advance. Many churches have advance registration. Sometimes in big cities priests marry several couples at once, although this is not customary, so if you don’t want to rush anywhere and get married yourself, you should choose a weekday for this, since on Sunday there are quite a lot of people willing. Weddings do not take place on Tuesday, Thursday or Saturday throughout the year, on the eve of temple and twelve holidays, and during Lent.

To get married, the groom must be 18 and the bride 16, then you can do without parental blessing. Persons who are close relatives, atheists, and unbaptized persons cannot marry if in fact one of the newlyweds has entered into an alliance with another person. Marriages between godparents and godchildren, persons who have been ordained to the priesthood or have taken monastic vows. Sometimes, in the event of divorce or death of one of the spouses, the church gives permission for a second wedding. By the way, pregnancy, contrary to public opinion, is not an obstacle to getting married. On the contrary, the church welcomes children to be born in a married marriage.

In any case, a wedding is a rite for which you need to prepare, to realize its full importance: some people get married on their wedding day, others a few months later, and many come to this years later. This is not important, because the main thing is that people who decide to cement their union before God trust and love each other!

It was not a church, but a civil act, which was performed in a solemn atmosphere and with a large crowd of people. The rite of the sacrament itself also changed significantly and only in the 16th century. finally took root in the form in which it is known today.

Preparation for the wedding

A wedding is accompanied by certain preparations, and not even just household ones. First of all, this concerns catechetical conversations that should be held with those entering into marriage. It is often believed that this communication is formal in nature, but its function is completely different: to warn young people about possible dangers and the pitfalls that can await them in marriage. Thanks to such conversations, you can once again, as if from the outside, look at the relationship and your chosen one, and think about how well-considered the decision to get married is.

If after conversations with the priest, there are no hesitations left, the groom must agree with him on the day.

In addition, those entering into marriage must receive the blessing of their parents, fast and receive communion on the eve of the sacrament.

When planning a wedding, it is important to know that it is not held during Lent, Nativity, Dormition, on the eve of Wednesday and Friday throughout the year, as well as on some other days.

How does the sacrament of wedding take place and how long does it last?

The sacrament of marriage begins with betrothal. It takes place at the very entrance to the temple or in its vestibule. The priest blesses the bride and groom with lighted candles, which he then gives to them; then prayers are read. After this, the priest brings from the altar the rings consecrated on the throne: one is put on, and the second is put on, while saying: “The servant of God (name) is betrothed to the servant of God (name) ...” and vice versa. In total, the rings are changed three times, after which special prayers are read again and the wedding begins.

Standing in front of the lectern, the priest tells the newlyweds about the essence and meaning of Christian marriage, and always clarifies whether the desire to enter into it is mutual. And the question “Have you made a promise to another (to another?)” implies not only a direct promise given to someone by one of the newlyweds, but also other moral obligations that can make the wedding impossible.

When mutual consent is obtained, the priest performs the wedding, which consists of reading prayers, laying crowns, and drinking from a common cup.

In ancient times, crowns were removed only on the 8th day. At the same time, the crowns, of course, were made not of metal, but of wood that did not wither for a long time, so that they were comfortable to wear.

At the end of the wedding ceremony, a cup is presented to the newlyweds, from which each one drinks three times in turn.

When the bride and groom drink from the chalice, the priest joins their hands and circles the newlyweds three times around the lectern. After which he takes off his crowns and says the first and perhaps most important parting words in their family life, united not only before people, but also before God.

In each, the sacrament of wedding takes place differently and on average lasts about 45 minutes. If the newlyweds are being married by a well-known priest, the sermon may take a little longer - then the wedding will last approximately 1 hour.

A wedding is not only one of the most amazing sacraments, but also deeply symbolic, where every detail has a special meaning. For example, the crowns that are placed on the heads of newlyweds symbolize not only the attributes of royal power and dignity, but also martyrdom and self-denial. After all, every marriage (no matter how happy it is) is, first of all, a feat.