Who is neurotic symptoms. These people are afraid

Psychologists say that there are more and more people with a neurotic character. Such people do not need hospitalization and drug treatment, unless we are talking about clinical manifestations of neuroticism. However, neurotics surround normal people everywhere.

People are accustomed to thinking that if someone is not taken away ambulance to a psychiatric hospital, which means everyone is healthy. Of course, it is difficult to clearly distinguish where a person is still healthy and at what point he becomes sick. Many healthy people continue to become only partially neurotic. However, the disease may worsen, leading to clinical manifestations.

In short, a neurotic person always and everywhere feels bad. What distinguishes him from a psychopath is that he is never satisfied. His dissatisfaction arises everywhere and for any reason:

He is dissatisfied with himself.
He is dissatisfied with his life.
He is dissatisfied with his behavior and character traits.
He is outraged by situations that happen to other people.
He's afraid of everything.
He is dissatisfied with the behavior of the people around him.

Neurotics are often afraid of something, so they try to seem cultured and correct, they read moral teachings, but they themselves do not adhere to anything.

Neuroticism in a mild form manifests itself in the fact that a person simply feels bad in any situation, despite external well-being. Neuroticism in severe form manifests itself in the form of irritability, weakness and constant fatigue, as well as the inability to perform physical or mental work for a long time.

Who is a neurotic?

A neurotic is a person with a certain way of thinking. It is characterized by anxiety, instability of emotions and low self-esteem (disrespect for oneself). Such a person constantly focuses on the bad moments. Even external well-being is not able to make him happy. He will always find something bad in the current situation. As a result, this leads to the fact that the neurotic does not achieve his goals and does not finish the things he starts, which is why he retreats even more into his neurotic state.

A neurotic is an emotional person who instinctively reacts and does not even control his emotions. Such a person is not able to adapt to the world around him. He always needs help, support, love and care. He establishes power over others through emotional pressure.

However, there are neurotics who become hermits because they are so unable to accept what is happening around them that they withdraw and isolate themselves from civilization.

A neurotic is a person who constantly feels unwell and always feels bad. He differs from a psychopath in that the psychopath actually feels good, but the people around him feel bad in his company.

Emotional instability leads a neurotic person to stable negativism. Neurotics are characterized by:

Fears.
Blaming others for your troubles.
Self-flagellation.
Distrust of people.
Obsession with oneself.
Diffidence.

Neurotics exist everywhere. Even in TV series and films, characters often suffer from various neurotic conditions, especially when it comes to love.

“My husband is an alcoholic”, “Why doesn’t my husband work?”, “All men are assholes”, etc. How much longer will men listen to how bad and wrong they are. It should be noted that after some time, men themselves begin to treat women in exactly the same way, who are constantly capricious, do not take care of themselves, and seem mercantile and masculine. A vicious circle is formed, where at first one side cannot show basic respect for the other side, causing a similar response towards itself.

Men become alcoholics, and women become masculine women. Why? Because neither men nor women show respect, understanding and love for each other.

Why does a man become an alcoholic? For the most part, there were difficult situations in his life when he expected help and support from his family and loved ones. But if the woman did not understand and did not support the man in difficult times, then she herself pushed him to look for another source of support and help. Alcohol calms and relaxes, that is, it gives a man something that his beloved woman does not give him. Now the question is: who helped the man become an alcoholic? Nobody forced the man to be an alcoholic, but he was pushed by a woman who did not show love and understanding at the moment when the man needed it.

Why do women become manly women who carry heavy bags themselves, earn money, bear all the burdens of family life, etc.? They want strong and responsible men next to them. But what kind of attitude do they see from their gentlemen? Remember all those situations when a woman said something stupid, and they laughed at her, saying “Women’s logic is impossible to understand!”; when a woman wanted another blouse for herself, and the man dissuaded her from buying it, although he later complained that she was unkempt and not sexy; when a woman was weak and defenseless, and a man humiliated her, saying how weak-willed she was. After such incidents, a woman wants to learn to defend herself, that is, to become more courageous and strong, like a man.

What is the problem with all these troubles? The fact is that neither men nor women respect or appreciate the distinctive qualities that are inherent in them. They do not know how to love and understand each other, no matter how different they are. A woman does not know how to communicate with men, and a man does not know how to accept a woman’s weakness. This is where all the problems that spread like a virus come from.

Someone needs your love, not dissatisfaction and criticism. A man doesn't need to hear from you how bad he is. He wants to see and know that he can make mistakes, be an imperfect person, but you will still love him and help him overcome difficulties. A woman does not need to know that she is capricious and weak (she already knows about it). She needs to see and feel that you still love her and are even willing to be strong and responsible.

Let us emphasize the fact that you are not encouraged to indulge the weaknesses of your loved ones. No. You are invited to let your loved one know that you love and understand him. And at the same time, you want him to solve his problems, eliminate his shortcomings. You are ready to support and help him, continuing to love him even in those moments until he copes with his difficulties. Someone needs your love, not dissatisfaction and criticism. Support your loved ones, inspire - this gives strength and desire to solve your problems. But while you criticize, do not understand and are only dissatisfied, you spread the virus of alcoholism, drug addiction, masculinity of women, etc. You deprive your loved ones of the support and peace of mind that they seek in what you then do not like.

Symptoms of a neurotic

In its mild form, neuroticism manifests itself in poor health despite external well-being. Such a person is considered healthy, something just took him out of peace of mind. But the symptoms of a severe form of neuroticism manifest themselves in hysteria, obsession, asthenia, and inability to work for a long time.

A neurotic person can be recognized by the following signs:

He often has headaches and feels dizzy.
He has problems with intimate relationships.
Changes in blood pressure occur.
There is a fear of missing something.
Fear of getting sick, obsessive desire to take care of your health.

Constant emotional tension makes a neurotic physically tired. And this sometimes forces him to retire. Despite all his well-being, the neurotic continues to remain unsure of himself, downtrodden, withdrawn and dissatisfied with everything.

A neurotic person understands the meaninglessness of his experiences and actions, but continues to perform them. Some neurotics take advantage of their “painful” state and control the people around them.

Neurotic Love

A neurotic in love constantly needs attention. He is not able to hear that his partner is tired and wants to rest, perceiving this as a reluctance to pay attention. To get what he wants, a neurotic uses every opportunity. Showing up is also a way to get attention, even if it involves negative emotions.

A neurotic is like a toddler who is focused only on his desires and needs. He wants to call his partner several times, talk about nothing, thus filling his life. He cannot stand loneliness, so he constantly wants to see his partner, not giving him the opportunity to rest and relax. A neurotic is an unhappy, small,...

A neurotic person only knows how to create codependent relationships, since he forces himself to love and show care, which the partner does not refuse at first. A neurotic makes himself helpless and weak so that his partner does everything for him. By the way, happiness, according to a neurotic, arises only as a result of the actions of a partner. He does not take upon himself the responsibility of making himself a happy person. He shifts all responsibility onto his partner, believing that he is the one who should make him happy.

In a healthy relationship, partners are responsible for their own happiness and have the right to privacy and distance for a while. A neurotic person cannot let go of his partner; he manipulates feelings of guilt, pity, tears and the words “You are my whole life... I can’t live without you...”.

If a neurotic person wants to change, then he needs to take responsibility for his own happiness, not depend on others and stop feeling sorry for himself. You need to be able to cope with negative emotions that arise in corresponding unpleasant situations.

How can a healthy person communicate with a neurotic person?

A neurotic should not be trained and re-educated, since he will not succumb to good intentions.
You shouldn’t show all the delights of life either; a neurotic person will find a lot of excuses why this is not so.
You need to make decisions firmly and categorically, since you don’t have to compromise with a neurotic person.

Relationships with a neurotic person are constant tragedies and problems. The main reason The reason why a relationship with a neurotic is impossible is that he only absorbs, but does not give anything good in return to his partner.

Bottom line

Many modern people are neurotic, although their manifestations and behavior are already considered normal. Many neurotics suffer in love, are unhappy at work, are poor and dysfunctional. If a neurotic manages to achieve some kind of well-being in life, then he can destroy this too, because he will remain unhappy and will not appreciate everything.

People with various psychological problems are not uncommon in the modern world, and there is great amount reasons. Not everyone knows who a neurotic is and how dangerous this condition is, much less how to help a person cope with the existing problem.

Who is this neurotic?

Many people mistakenly believe that neurosis is a mental illness, but in fact, it is a personality disorder and can be gotten rid of at any stage of the development of the problem. It is protracted and even with successful treatment, relapses are possible. A neurotic is an individual characterized by constant anxiety, emotional instability and low self-esteem. According to statistics, neuroticism as a personality type is the most common today. There are three groups of reasons that can cause a personality disorder:

An internal crisis, that is, a person who has experienced the loss of a loved one, war or other overwhelming event, can become neurotic.
A stressful situation and traumatic factors of varying severity, for example, or dismissal from work.
Hormonal changes in the body can trigger the occurrence of neurosis. This may occur during puberty or menopause.

Signs of a neurotic

There are a huge number of symptoms that may indicate. A neurotic is a character type that can be described by the following traits:

The presence of a huge number of phobias, and this applies even to quite banal things, for example, the fear of enjoying life.
Constantly expecting failure. Living in such a scenario in any case leads to disappointment.
If you ask people who a neurotic is, the popular answer will be “a loser,” since a person with such a disorder rarely achieves what he wants.
Denying the existence of a problem and suppressing aggression. If present, a person begins to project existing problems onto other people.

Neurotic woman

To notice whether a loved one has mental problems, you just need to observe him from the outside and analyze his behavior. There are a number of symptoms that indicate a neurotic disorder:

Irritation occurs from extraneous sounds, for example, from a pen knocking on a table or neighbors talking behind the wall. He wants to hide from everything in silence.
The desire to constantly go to extremes and the absence of a “golden mean”.
An underestimate does not provide the opportunity to achieve success in life, so people with a psychological disorder begin to take an interest in other people's lives.
When communicating with other people, neurotics constantly expect some kind of negativity.
A violation of one’s own desires occurs, for example, a person with a mental problem may start eating a lot or become a shopaholic.
Discussions on serious topics reveal naivety and stupidity.

Neurotic man

All the symptoms described earlier are also relevant for representatives of the stronger sex, and vice versa. When a mental disorder is present for a long time, physiological problems may arise.

sexual disorders;
neuroticism is also accompanied by dizziness;
blood pressure surges;
constant feeling of fatigue and insomnia;
fear of illness and panic about one's health.

Neurotics and psychotics - differences

Many people confuse these concepts and there are indeed many differences between them. Who these neurotics are has already been sorted out, and as for psychotics, these are people with a severe mental disorder, in which their activities differ significantly from the surrounding reality. Psychotics and neurotics behave strangely, but the former exhibit dangerous symptoms, for example, a disorder of perception of the surrounding world, memory and thinking. Eat different shapes psychoses: delusional, depressive, affective, alcoholic, hysterical and others.

How to deal with a neurotic person?

A meeting with a person with a mental disorder can happen at any time, and many people have similar personalities in their close circle, so it is important to know how to communicate with a neurotic person:

You should not try to verbally convince the patient that he has a problem; believe me, this is a thankless task that will not bring results.
The desire to show a neurotic the world from its good side, in most cases remains unanswered, since people with mental problems do not hear or perceive any arguments.
For those who are interested in how to manage a neurotic person, you need to know that it is important to act quickly and ruthlessly with such people. Persuasion will not work here, therefore, in order to make adjustments in the life of such a person, you will have to act against his will.

How to help a neurotic?

To achieve positive dynamics in treatment and really help the patient, you cannot do without the help of a specialist. A neurotic is a person with whom it is not so easy to find contact, and a psychologist, using different techniques, will be able to find the reason that caused the problem.

The first step in therapy is to identify and eliminate negative factors that provoke neurotic reactions. Without normalizing living conditions, it is impossible to achieve progress in treatment.
At the second stage of therapy, obvious symptoms of neurosis are eliminated, which contributes to a more adequate perception of the world around us.
The main task of the specialist at the end of therapy is to activate him so that he returns to society and reacts normally to different life situations.

How to live as a neurotic?

A person with a personality disorder often faces a split personality, with the second “I” always acting against real desires and aspirations. It is important to recognize the problem and make a decision to get rid of the invisible shackles that prevent you from living and developing normally. A neurotic person must direct all his strength to overcome the internal contradictions of his condition. To get results, each person must develop a method of self-regulation for himself independently.

How to stop being neurotic?

Psychologists say that a person with a nervous disorder must learn to relieve tension. To hear yourself and your body, you need to free yourself from subconscious fears, complexes and stereotypes. The neurotic personality type can be rebuilt using the following relaxation exercises:

You need to learn to concentrate on yourself. To develop this feeling, you need to go to the wall and stand with your back against it at a distance of 10-15 cm. Relax and focus on your own condition. Close your eyes and start falling backwards.
To relieve nervous tension, you can start swinging and this method often works on an instinctive level. It is important to find your own rhythm.
It is recommended to keep a psychological diary, where you need to record your own feelings and changes occurring in your inner world. It is important to be aware of your own “I”, to understand values and relationships.
Continuing to find out who neurotics are and how to cope with the problem on your own, it is worth giving one more piece of advice: it is useful to regularly reflect on ideas, people, events, and also conduct an internal dialogue with yourself.

How not to raise a neurotic?

Many parents do not even suspect that by their actions they are harming their child, disturbing his psyche. It is important to know that a neurotic is a personality type that can be formed due to improper upbringing. To avoid mistakes, you need to consider the following tips:

You cannot focus only on achievements and especially on failures.
Parents should not ridicule their child for his actions or defects in appearance.
Explain your decisions and answer all questions. The child must understand the situation and draw conclusions about what is good and what is bad. Phrases like “behave well” or “don’t act stupid” should be excluded, and it is better to give the child an explanation.
Many parents, unwittingly, form phobias in their children. You can’t create fear by saying that a policeman or Baba Yaga will come. Experts do not recommend using the phrases: “stop whining” or “don’t be a coward.”
A neurotic character can be cultivated by instilling in a child the idea that people are all bad and that good deeds should not be expected from them. Many mothers often use the phrase “all men are assholes” with their daughters.

Books for neurotics

Eat various literature on this topic, where you can find useful information.

"With neurosis through life" A. Kurpatov. The author talks about who a neurotic is and how a person destroys his own life. Having understood the existing problems, it will be much easier to change your life.
"Neurosis and Personality Growth" K. Horney. This book contains detailed and accessible language It describes who a neurotic is and his inner world, as well as the development and treatment of such a personality disorder.
"Family Romance of Neurotics" Z. Freud. This book contains several works of a psychiatrist, which at one time shocked the public and became classics of psychoanalysis.

One of the most common features of a neurotic is his complete dependence on his environment and the desire to gain the approval and affection of other people at all costs. All people want attention and love, but in a neurotic person this thirst is greatly exaggerated, disproportionate to the role that the love and approval of others play in life.

Neurotics want such attention and love from all the people they know indiscriminately, be it a neighbor staircase, a work colleague or a university student acquaintance. Their desires extend to literally all women and men, but usually they are not aware of this desire. And when someone doesn't invite them to a party or meeting, they feel resentful and disappointed. Although in fact it could have been a party of only close people and they should not have been invited there.

Excessive dependence on receiving approval interferes with normal life and does not allow adequate appreciation of friendship, love and affection; The neurotic interprets any criticism and demands as humiliation and betrayal. For ordinary people, love is quite compatible with criticism and demands on a partner. And for a neurotic, any such criticism or demand causes a storm of indignation, an emotional breakdown, and stress. In this regard, it is generally impossible to make a comment to a neurotic - the response will always be a violent emotional reaction.

Internal insecurity, vulnerability is the second feature that characterizes a neurotic. The feeling of inferiority and inconsistency of true characteristics with self-images is also a trait of a neurotic personality.

So, for example, a very attractive, beautiful girl is convinced that she is ugly and unattractive; or a master of his craft, a pastry chef, an excellent cook, constantly complains that his cake won’t turn out, and literally cries bitter tears when he bakes it. When the cake is ready, he constantly doubts whether there is enough cream, chocolate, does it smell of soda, etc., and only after much praise from guests or family members, having somehow calmed down, begins to believe that everything is done Fine.

The feeling of inferiority can be hidden behind compensatory mechanisms, manifested in self-aggrandizement, in an obsessive tendency to flaunt oneself, in a favorable light, to impress, to use all possible means, attributes, methods that correspond to prestige (money, gold, diamonds, painting collections, antiques , unusual knowledge, etc.).

The next group of traits characteristic of neurotics are certain prohibitions. Such people cannot express their desires or cannot refuse the request of others. They have internal prohibitions on doing something in their own interests: expressing their opinion, asking someone to do something, choosing and agreeing with someone, establishing pleasant contacts. They also cannot defend themselves against persistent requests, they cannot say “no”. For example, in a store they cannot refuse a salesperson if he is pushing some product on them, or they cannot interrupt a conversation with those with whom they do not want to talk, or they can accept an invitation to a place where they do not want to go, even to the point of not can sometimes refuse to scammers.

A neurotic person does not know how to make long-term plans. For example, when choosing a profession, neurotics rush around and don’t know where to go to study or work. When choosing a husband or wife, they are tormented by fears. In these cases, they are primarily driven by neurotic fears. And sometimes they make the first choice they come across or cannot make it for many years.

Often neurotic behavior takes the form of aggression, which manifests itself in being domineering, picky, critical, humiliating and suppressing others. Neurotics are almost always convinced that they are doing the right thing and sincerely, without even suspecting that their behavior is sometimes offensive. Very rarely, when something out of the ordinary happens, they realize that they were too persistent.

Sometimes we see the opposite picture - people who are constantly “ridden”, or they act as “scapegoats”; they are constantly deceived, humiliated, and controlled. This is also a form of neurotic behavior.

Another feature of relationships that characterize a neurotic is the attitude towards sexual life. Here we see two extreme variations. The first is excessive activity. The second is a complete ban on sex life.

Prohibitions can manifest themselves in all variants, from courtship processes to love play.

As already noted, the main feature of a neurotic personality is anxiety. Unlike a normal person, in whom fear and anxiety manifest themselves as an objective reaction to danger, the anxiety of a neurotic is not caused by anything, his anxiety is unfounded. It is not connected with the real situation, but only with his idea of it. And it is useless to influence him by persuasion; this anxiety is irrational.

K. Horney identifies four main ways to avoid anxiety: rationalizing anxiety, denying anxiety, getting rid of it with the help of drugs and alcohol, avoiding anxiety with the help of thoughts, feelings and situations.

Neurotic jealousy also distinguishes a neurotic person; it is dictated by the constant fear of losing a loved one, although the partner gives absolutely no reason for such jealousy. This type of jealousy can manifest itself on the part of parents towards their children if they seek to get married, or, conversely, on the part of children when one of the parents wants to get married.

Anxiety involves different ways to calm down. One of these paths is the search for love and affection. Another path is the desire for power, prestige and possession. Of course, the desire to dominate, gain prestige, acquire wealth and achieve well-being is not in itself a neurotic tendency, nor is the desire for love and affection. They become neurotic when the desire for power is born from anxiety and weakness. Whereas in a normal person, the desire for power is born from self-confidence and a sense of strength.

A neurotic person finds peace and consolation in humiliating other people and infringing on their interests.

In many cases, power, prestige and fortune must be achieved in an environment of intense competition. Neurotic rivalry and the stress that results from it have become a sign of our time. Neurotic rivalry differs from ordinary rivalry in three ways. The first is that the neurotic constantly compares himself with others even when this is not necessary. And, most importantly, he is interested in success, prestige and the impression that he will make as a result.

The second feature of a neurotic personality is not just achieving success. Such a person wants to become unique, exceptional, he wants good luck to always accompany him. If for many, success is success as such, then for a neurotic, success must be unconditional and expressed in complete superiority over others.

The third feature is that the neurotic personality follows the rule “...no one but me...”. Such a person has the hidden hostility usually characteristic of ambitious neurotics. He is sure that “no one but him...”, no one should be more beautiful, richer, more capable. He needs to refute, to bring others down, to see them defeated. And this neurotic rivalry has destructive consequences both for the neurotic and for those around him. It can cover any area - business, science, education, marriage, love, etc.

Due to the fact that the destructive rivalry of people suffering from neurosis generates even greater anxiety, an aversion to competition arises. The contradictory nature of the neurotic begins to show duality. He acts according to the saying: “quiet, lower than the grass,” “keep your head down.” He begins to humiliate himself, and in such a way that humiliation and self-abasement can sometimes reach enormous proportions.

Guilt plays a huge role in the neurotic symptom of such a person. A person who suffers from neurosis often explains his suffering as deserved. And this feeling of guilt leaves a noticeable imprint on the personality of the sufferer. But ultimately, behind the feelings of guilt are fear and anxiety. Neurotic in struggle with

their internal conflicts He endures a lot of suffering, but he uses his suffering as a means to achieve his goals. Sometimes for a neurotic, suffering is the only means of defense. Through self-flagellation, he avoids accusations and, on the contrary, at the same time blames others, appearing sick, thereby avoiding criticism and reproaches. By humiliating himself, he avoids competition.

These include light sleep, excessive fatigue, poor endurance, as well as very poor tolerance of both bright light, stuffiness, and noise. People suffering from this disease find it very difficult to sleep. This problem is especially noticeable in childhood. As a rule, with age, all these symptoms become less pronounced. However, this only happens if usual life person is developing well. To forget about the signs of the disease, a person only needs to follow a healthy lifestyle, which includes following a daily routine, eating a healthy diet, and giving up all bad habits.

Are neurasthenic and neurotic the same thing?

Close, but not quite.

The concept of “neurasthenic” came down to the people from the stage - not every actor could play the role of a painfully nervous, unbalanced, weak-willed person, easily susceptible to various influences, moods and in a state of acute mental crisis.

Neuroticism is a mental disorder that is very a large number people among us are the type of people even in comfortable conditions experiencing self-doubt and self-confidence, worries, fears, distrust of people, and as a result of this, he is fixated on himself and is prone to either accusations or self-accusation.

Neurosis and neurotic personality

2. Aggressive “movement against people.”

3. Separated “movement from people.”

Subordinate type of neurotic personality or the “movement towards people” attitude

He gives everything to others in order to get from them what he needs. As a result, one often comes to disappointment, because... others do not live up to his expectations.

Neurotic of this type feels like a weak and helpless being. His message to the world is “I am small and require love and protection.” This helplessness is justified, because wrestling and competition are prohibited for such a person.
He considers others more worthy, more capable, more talented than himself. This attitude is reinforced by a lack of persistence and firmness, which actually weakens his abilities.
The attitude to evaluate oneself through the approval or disapproval of other people. Self-esteem is correlated with the evaluation of others. Any criticism scares him, he is ready to bend as far as necessary in order to regain the lost affection of another person.

This type of neurotic suppresses his aggressive impulses. His pattern of behavior is to constantly take the blame. In accordance with this, he has many internal prohibitions: to be demanding, critical, ambitious, domineering, and to apply pressure. Because he is strongly focused on others, internal prohibitions do not allow him to do something for himself. It is difficult for him to enjoy life alone. Food, cinema, music, nature bring pleasure only in the company of others. This greatly impoverishes his life and makes him dependent on others.

What represses this neurotic personality type? Lots of aggressive urges.

Aggressive, “movement against people” attitude

“Movement from the people” and the tendency towards isolation

Looking at yourself as an object is detached;
Establish an emotional distance between themselves and others - they try not to get involved in an emotional connection with others (love, struggle, cooperation, competition);
Suppression and denial of feelings - comes from the need for distance from others;
The more emotions are suppressed, the more emphasis is placed on the intellectual sphere;
Great need for “self-sufficiency” - can reduce their needs in order to be less dependent on others;
Need for privacy;
They don’t like to share their experiences - too personal questions shock them;
They build partnerships more easily with similarly isolated individuals, because those recognize their need for distance. And if emotional distance is ensured, then they can be in a relationship for a long time.

Basic need: the need for complete independence. From this need follows the need for self-sufficiency and solitude. Thanks to this, they maintain their integrity.

Reasons nervous breakdown it could be the husband’s betrayal, the wife’s neuroticism, humiliation in the army, unpopularity in the team, the inability to earn a living if she was comfortable before.

Who is a neurotic and how to stop being neurotic?

People with various psychological problems are not uncommon in the modern world, and there are a huge number of reasons for this. Not everyone knows who a neurotic is and how dangerous this condition is, much less how to help a person cope with the existing problem.

Who is this neurotic?

An internal crisis, that is, a person who has experienced the loss of a loved one, war or other overwhelming event, can become neurotic.
A stressful situation and traumatic factors of varying severity, for example, unhappy love or dismissal from work.
Hormonal changes in the body can trigger the occurrence of neurosis. This may occur during puberty or menopause.

Signs of a neurotic

There are a huge number of symptoms that may indicate psychological problems. A neurotic is a character type that can be described by the following traits:

The presence of a huge number of phobias, and this applies even to quite banal things, for example, the fear of enjoying life.
Constantly expecting failure. Living in such a scenario in any case leads to disappointment.
If you ask people who a neurotic is, the popular answer will be “a loser,” since a person with such a disorder rarely achieves what he wants.
Denying the existence of a problem and suppressing aggression. If you have a personality disorder, a person begins to project existing problems onto other people.

Neurotic woman

To notice whether a loved one has mental problems, you just need to observe him from the outside and analyze his behavior. There are a number of symptoms that indicate a neurotic disorder:

Irritation occurs from extraneous sounds, for example, from a pen knocking on a table or neighbors talking behind the wall. He wants to hide from everything in silence.
The desire to constantly go to extremes and the absence of a “golden mean”.
An underestimate does not provide the opportunity to achieve success in life, so people with a psychological disorder begin to take an interest in other people's lives.
When communicating with other people, neurotics constantly expect some kind of negativity.
A violation of one’s own desires occurs, for example, a person with a mental problem may start eating a lot or become a shopaholic.
Discussions on serious topics reveal naivety and stupidity.

Neurotic man

All the symptoms described earlier are also relevant for representatives of the stronger sex, and vice versa. When a mental disorder is present for a long time, physiological problems may arise.

sexual disorders;
neuroticism is accompanied by frequent headaches and dizziness;
blood pressure surges;
constant feeling of fatigue and insomnia;
fear of illness and panic about one's health.

Neurotics and psychotics - differences

Many people confuse these concepts and there are indeed many differences between them. Who these neurotics are has already been sorted out, and as for psychotics, these are people with a severe mental disorder, in which their activities differ significantly from the surrounding reality. Psychotics and neurotics behave strangely, but the former exhibit dangerous symptoms, for example, disorders of perception of the surrounding world, memory and thinking. There are different forms of psychosis: delusional, depressive, affective, alcoholic, hysterical and others.

How to deal with a neurotic person?

You should not try to verbally convince the patient that he has a problem; believe me, this is a thankless task that will not bring results.
The desire to show a neurotic the world from its good side, in most cases remains unanswered, since people with mental problems do not hear or perceive any arguments.
For those who are interested in how to manage a neurotic person, you need to know that it is important to act quickly and ruthlessly with such people. Persuasion will not work here, therefore, in order to make adjustments in the life of such a person, you will have to act against his will.

How to help a neurotic?

To achieve positive dynamics in treatment and really help the patient, you cannot do without the help of a specialist. A neurotic is a person with whom it is not so easy to find contact, and a psychologist, using various techniques, will be able to find the reason that provoked the problem.

The first step in therapy is to identify and eliminate negative factors that provoke neurotic reactions. Without normalizing living conditions, it is impossible to achieve progress in treatment.
At the second stage of therapy, obvious symptoms of neurosis are eliminated, which contributes to a more adequate perception of the world around us.
The main task of the specialist at the end of therapy is to activate the person’s personality so that he returns to society and reacts normally to different life situations.

How to live as a neurotic?

How to stop being neurotic?

You need to learn to concentrate on yourself. To develop this sensation, you need to approach the wall and stand with your back against it at a distance of cm. Relax and focus on your own condition. Close your eyes and start falling backwards.
To relieve nervous tension, you can start swinging and this method often works on an instinctive level. It is important to find your own rhythm.
It is recommended to keep a psychological diary, where you need to record your own feelings and changes occurring in your inner world. It is important to be aware of your own “I”, to understand values and relationships.
Continuing to find out who neurotics are and how to cope with the problem on your own, it is worth giving one more piece of advice: it is useful to regularly reflect on ideas, people, events, and also conduct an internal dialogue with yourself.

How not to raise a neurotic?

You cannot focus only on achievements and especially on failures.
Parents should not ridicule their child for his actions or defects in appearance.
Explain your decisions and answer all questions. The child must understand the situation and draw conclusions about what is good and what is bad. Phrases like “behave well” or “don’t act stupid” should be excluded, and it is better to give the child an explanation.
Many parents, unwittingly, form phobias in their children. You can’t create fear by saying that a policeman or Baba Yaga will come. Experts do not recommend using the phrases: “stop whining” or “don’t be a coward.”
A neurotic character can be cultivated by instilling in a child the idea that people are all bad and that good deeds should not be expected from them. Many mothers often use the phrase “all men are assholes” with their daughters.

Books for neurotics

There is various literature on this topic in which you can find useful information.

“With neurosis through life” A. Kurpatov. The author talks about who a neurotic is and how a person destroys his own life. Having understood the existing problems, it will be much easier to change your life.
“Neurosis and Personality Growth” by K. Horney. This book describes in detail and in accessible language who a neurotic is and his inner world, as well as the development and treatment of such a personality disorder.
“Family novel of neurotics” S. Freud. This book contains several works of a psychiatrist, which at one time shocked the public and became classics of psychoanalysis.

Positive and negative sides of neurotics

Today, there are a huge number of reasons that lead to the appearance of neuroses. Most of them are individual and difficult to recognize. Therefore, such people have to seek help from a psychotherapist.

The most typical manifestations include: irritability, changeable mood, panic attacks, problems with sleep, digestion, headaches, and so on.

Neurotics - who are they?

Neurotics are people who suffer from a specific psychological disorder. Most often, the reasons lie in childhood. This condition can be safely considered a protective function of the body.

The term “neuroticism” refers to a certain deviation from established norms. This is why neurotics are considered disadvantaged individuals who have a very difficult time adapting to their environment.

The emergence of such an incomprehensible defensive reaction leads to: strict control over children, aggression, feelings of anger and other emotional outbursts.

How they become

The basis of all problems is not only the current circumstances, but also the obvious inaction of a person, his incorrect reaction to current events.

For modern people grievances and claims have become like air, without which it is difficult to live. We ourselves provoke those around us to negative emotions in order to become offended as a result and make ourselves a victim. But for sensible individuals this fact is incomprehensible. In fact, mentally healthy people really don't do this. These habits are typical only for those who have behavioral problems. This cannot be called a mental illness, rather just a habit of constantly being in the role of a “victim”. They get so caught up in the rhythm of life that they don’t even think that they have any problems.

A neurotic is a person who, even in early childhood, had to feel psychological pressure on himself, and for some reason he was unable to cope with it. In this way he tries to protect himself from similar situations in the future.

Due to great pressure, internal pain, he lost the ability to respond normally to external factors and now is guided only by instincts and emotions. In his subconscious, an incorrect concept of love, friendship, relationships with people and himself was formed.

For example, in childhood, parents did not give the baby the love that he so needed. His mother or father did not pay attention to his interests and were very rude. As a result, the young man will believe that all girls are as cold as his mother and that they need to be obeyed all the time. Girls will begin to pay attention only to those men who dominate and humiliate others.

The main reason is that such children have never seen other behavior. They are convinced that suffering helps them achieve love, fame, and self-respect.

But the human psyche consists of completely different attitudes that are aimed at love, so such incorrect behavior leads to the appearance of internal imbalance and tension.

Such a calm life seems simple and boring to them.

This will happen until the guy or girl realizes their problem, stops looking for partners and thinks about changing their behavior. They will have to make every effort to break the vicious circle.

Absolutely everyone experiences emotions, but there is a tangible difference here: a healthy person will not tolerate such an attitude towards himself and will try to change his life. But a neurotic person, on the contrary, will do everything to continue communicating with people who bring him torment, suffering, and receive negative emotions at the same time.

Main symptoms

Neurotic conditions have the following hidden symptoms:

Problems in sexual relationships.
Severe headaches and dizziness.
Blood pressure surges.
Fear of getting sick, strong concern about the health of all family members.
The emergence of a constant physical fatigue for fear of missing something.

There are also other symptoms that require special attention:

A person gets irritated by any strong sounds and therefore tries to run away from it and find solitude.
People who are characterized by neuroticism do not have a “golden mean”.
A neurasthenic person constantly waits for rejection from the people around him, which leads to stress.
They have low self-esteem, and because of this they cannot succeed in relationships.

Basic conditions

Neurosis

This term refers to a certain pathological condition that causes disruption of the nervous system, manifested by a variety of symptoms and varying degrees of severity.

An important criterion is the absence of areas of brain damage. There are a huge number of signs of neurosis that are very opposite in nature, for example, insomnia, drowsiness, or depression, activity. This also includes fears, depression, obsessive states, thoughts, obsession.

Today, specialists have begun to use this term less; Wikipedia says that over time it will completely disappear from medical terminology. International classifiers have already gotten rid of this concept and identified a group of similar diseases called “Disorders associated with stress, as well as neurotic and somatoform.”

Neuroticism

A certain type of personality, which is characterized by emotional instability, constant feelings of anxiety, guilt, and low self-esteem.

Such a neurotic person is prone to worry and constantly finds himself in inappropriate situations. Outwardly, everything seems to be fine, but inside there is obvious mental discomfort.

How does inadequate anxiety manifest itself? For example, after leaving home, such a person will constantly think about whether he turned off the light, closed the door, gas, or water. Or the presence of strong feelings about the appearance, health, fidelity of the other half.

Positive traits

Such people are loyal and attentive.

Neurotics never forget important dates, events, holidays. They always rush to congratulate their friend on his birthday.

Experts have proven that responsibility combined with neurasthenia has its advantages, for example, excessive anxiety about one’s health allows one to avoid many problems and serious illnesses.

They find peace in the faces of their loved ones.

As practice shows, a neurotic person who is highly stressed can calm down when surrounded by loved ones and people close to him.

All decisions are fateful.

A person characterized by neurotic behavior is always faced with a large choice. There are no small things for him, he takes everything to heart, as if for the last time.

Neuroticism can help increase the speed of the thinking process.

Scientists from Downstate Medical Center in New York have been studying this issue for a long time. Based on their experiments, they came to the conclusion that people who are constantly in doubt and fear show excellent results in specially designed IQ tests.

This happens because their head is constantly in tension throughout their lives, while their brain thinks faster. But this opinion continues to remain controversial, since in practice there were many such individuals who got lost when they found themselves in unforeseen situations.

Attitude towards love

Mentally unbalanced people very often inadequately assess what is happening around them, putting their desires above logic. The following methods of winning love are distinguished:

In this case, people are guided by the fact that they can bribe with their actions a certain person. And this is far from romantic. But who will tolerate constant irritability and mental imbalance? Of course, no one, so soon a hard refusal comes.

When a neurotic realizes that money cannot buy love, he switches to pitiful motives. This method is quite effective, especially for the fair sex, who spontaneously respond to the tears and requests of their neighbors. But here it is important to know the limits so as not to overdo it.

A very tough method, which a neurosthenic person switches to after all previous tests. Threats begin, even to the point that I will commit suicide, you and this whole world. This option is considered the saddest. A person dooms himself to loneliness.

Problems at work

Most often, problems in the workplace arise due to lack of self-confidence. At the same time, a person can be a real specialist and regularly receive praise and awards.

But if he cannot get rid of neurosis, he will constantly believe that:

Impossible tasks are set before him;
everyone wants to trip him up and fire him;
colleagues are unsure of his skills;
everyone is against him and wants to get rid of him quickly.

The worst thing is that all these thoughts are based on low self-esteem. Any idea, like neuroticism itself, arises spontaneously. One wrong look is enough for a neurotic to conclude that they want to fire him. And for him it will no longer be at all important that the employees were simply discussing the weather, and the boss looked somewhere into the distance, running his eyes over all the employees. It is simply unrealistic to convince people suffering from neuroses.

Rules of communication

Neurotics surround us on all sides. However, they do not admit it. They lead a secluded lifestyle and try to stay at home more, since any movement of theirs can destroy their business and family.

It is important to remember that treating and teaching neurotics without their consent is a futile exercise. Psychoneurosis does not allow such a person to work normally and effectively.

Even if a neurotic has many achievements, he continues to have pain and a clear neurasthenic syndrome in his soul. The tightness and complexes of such a person result in periodic hysterics. He redirects all the negative things that happen around him to himself.

There is absolutely no use in trying to prove anything here. He simply will not understand, and a number of reproaches will fall on you.

When communicating with such people, you need to immediately remove all pity and learn to make decisions instantly. Remember that when you prove that you are right, you will encounter intense irritation.

By the concept of “relationship” we are accustomed to understand the dedication of two people. But, unfortunately, neurotics are not used to giving anything, but they are ready to receive. Then a normal person gets angry, because he wanted to see the return. Such relationships are doomed from the start. The person is naive in his hopes, because he should have known what to expect from communication and not create illusions.

Defensive reactions

Neurotic syndrome involves the use of basic methods of protection:

Search for love and understanding;
The desire to dominate others.

Very often, the second option leads to the fact that a neurotic grows into a leader capable of leading even great wars. In this way, he tries to prove to himself that he can easily lead people.

There is another reaction - defensive, when people become withdrawn and lose interest in the world. They simply gradually move away from society, turning into hermits.

Childhood neurosis

Very often, various psychotraumatic factors become the cause of childhood neuroses. Therefore, the blame in most cases falls on the parents.

The most common causes of neurosis in children include:

Family problems;
lack of attention, love, affection;
searching for new ways of self-expression;
overprotective parents, excessive anxiety;
internal experiences.

What to do and how to treat

Throughout their lives, neurotics try to do everything in defiance of fate. But this behavior is very wrong; self-sacrifice is far from the only option with which you can gain the favor of people around you.

A neurotic must first learn to understand himself, and only then build a personal life.

It is always necessary to look at those around you with sober eyes and understand that all people can also do stupid things, because no one is immune from this.

By noticing this and changing your opinion, you can become objective and not pay attention to the opinions of other people.

When communicating with friends and relatives, you should try to take an active position. Then there is a chance to stop being a closed, insecure individual and find your happiness. The right path will turn a neurotic into an absolutely healthy person. Sometimes a change of environment can be helpful. The best medicine is kind, open, positive individuals.

Equally important is communication with nature, for example, walks in the fresh air, trips to the country house, to the forest. That is why neurosis is often called a disease of city residents who do not see anything beautiful except their apartment.

When to ask for help

The main thing is to remember that neuroses do not arise from scratch. Behind all this there are some problematic events leading to undesirable consequences.

When a person and others see that there is no improvement, it is important to find an experienced specialist who can help in this difficult matter.

Conclusion

Each person has his own secret of happiness. But it is always based on self-confidence and confidence in the future. When we begin to analyze our actions and control our actions, then we become true masters of our destiny. This is what is called the correct way to get rid of neurosis.

Neurotics, psychotics: from normal to pathological

In simple words, a neurotic is a person who feels bad about himself and everything. In this way, a neurotic differs from a psychotic, who often feels good, but with whom those around him feel bad.

Neuroticism is characterized by emotional instability, with a dominant “negative” connotation. The usual state is lack of confidence in oneself and one’s strengths, worries, fears, distrust of people, and as a result of this - self-obsession and a tendency to either accusations or self-recrimination.

In a mild form (neuroticism), a person experiences internal discomfort despite external well-being and good adaptation in society (in this case, the person is considered healthy). In severe form (neurosis), a person is already ill, his condition is characterized by asthenic, obsessive and/or hysterical manifestations, as well as a temporary decrease in mental and physical performance.

The higher the level of neuroticism, the lower the ability to learn from experience, the more difficult it is to overcome fears and stop activities, the destructiveness and unreasonableness of which is obvious.

In turn, “psychosis” with medical point vision signifies a serious mental disorder. Psychoses include those diseases that are often accompanied by a change in consciousness, a lack of criticism of oneself or the environment. In particular, delirium is a disorder of consciousness, usually characterized by abundant visual hallucinations; oneiroid - a state of consciousness reminiscent of a dream, often of fantastic content with false hallucinations, delusional phenomena; amentia - a confused state of consciousness with confusion, disordered thinking (unlike delirium, amentia can last several weeks or even months); twilight state of consciousness - a more or less pronounced narrowing of the field of consciousness that occurs during epilepsy or hysteria. It should be noted that any delusions and hallucinations also indicate the presence of psychosis.

According to Nancy McWilliams, on whose work this article is based, personality can be of the NEUROTIC, BORDERLINE and PSYCHOTIC levels. There are also conditionally “healthy” ones (although the old joke goes like this: healthy people no – there are some who have not been examined). And yet, in the “healthy”-neurotic range, one can live normally: have more or less realistic image yourself, fairly stable self-esteem, to be adapted to society and able to build and maintain close relationships.

The following PERSONALITY TYPES are primarily considered in clinical picture, however, the severity of a particular psychotype can be presented at different levels: from neurotic to psychotic. In addition, one person may exhibit expression of several types.

The formation of a certain psychotype is always a combination of several factors: genetic, social, the factor of family upbringing (and the behavior of the parents themselves), a certain freedom of choice, manifested already in childhood in the way of responding to certain stimuli and circumstances.

1. Antisocial (psychopathic) personality type

Aggression (increased congenital aggressiveness)

Impulsivity (immediately acting out one's emotional states)

High threshold (higher than average) that brings pleasure from arousal. (“Whereas most of us get emotional satisfaction from good music, a sexual relationship, the beauty of nature, a smart joke or a job well done, the psychopath needs an abrupt, more “shaking” experience in order to feel energized and good) .

A grandiose desire to avoid the experience of weakness and envy.

Dissociation of personal responsibility (failure to accept one's responsibility).

Low social (emotional) intelligence: lack empathy and do not know how to talk about their feelings

Low social learning ability

Inability to have emotional intimacy

Leading defense mechanisms:

Prerequisites for the formation of an antisocial personality type:

Childhood antisocial people often characterized by instability, plenty of danger and chaos, and a chaotic mixture of harsh discipline and overindulgence. Most often, the presence of weak, depressed and masochistic mothers and hot-tempered, inconsistent and sadistic fathers, as well as alcoholism and drug use by family members. Patterns of moving, loss, and family breakups are common. Lack of a sense of power at developmental moments when it is needed can lead children with this difficulty to spend much of their lives seeking evidence of their omnipotence.

Psychopathic people cannot recognize the presence of ordinary emotions in themselves, as they are associated with weakness and vulnerability.

In addition, psychopathy can be “inherited”: the child repeats the protective decisions of his parents.

More often, individuals of the antisocial (psychopathic) type are men.

2. Narcissistic personality type

Narcissism - both normal and pathological - is a topic that Freud (1914) periodically paid attention to, borrowing the term from the Greek myth of Narcissus, a youth who fell in love with his reflection in a mirror of water and eventually died of the melancholy that reflection could never satisfy.

Unstable self-esteem, self-doubt and fragile self-identity

Tendency to judge (self and others) and evaluate

An inner feeling or fear that they are “not a good fit”; feelings of shame, weakness and low status

Intolerance of criticism, especially public

Polarities of Ego states: grandiose (everything is good) or, conversely, depleted (everything is bad) perception of one’s own “I”.

Feelings of vague falsehood, shame, envy, emptiness or incompleteness, ugliness and inferiority, or their compensatory opposites - self-affirmation, self-esteem, contempt, defensive self-sufficiency, vanity and superiority.

Perfectionism and maximalism (and, accordingly, the difficulties of compromise)

Hypochondria (preoccupation with one's health and morbid fear of death)

Leading defense mechanisms:

Prerequisites for the formation of a narcissistic personality type (aspects of childhood):

Narcissistic individuals may (could) be extremely important to parents or other caregivers, not because of who they really are, but because they serve a function.

A related aspect of raising people who later become narcissistic is the climate of constant evaluation in the family. If the child is relied on as a vital object for one's self-esteem, then whenever the child disappoints, he will be criticized, directly or indirectly.

Congenital hypersensitivity, concomitant avoidance of stimulation

Introversion. However, despite his own closedness, he often shows interest in his surroundings.

High creativity (creative abilities)

Attachment ambivalence: They crave intimacy even though they feel the constant threat of being swallowed up by others.

Leading defense mechanisms:

There is a lack of general psychological defenses (which affects hypersensitivity)

Escaping into fantasy

Prerequisites for the formation schizoid type personalities:

One type of relationship that may provoke avoidance in a child is the encroaching, overinvolved, overprotective type of parenting. Clinicians seeing male patients with schizoid traits also tend to find at the family basis a seductive, boundary-violating mother and an impatient, critical father.

The development of the schizoid pattern of detachment and withdrawal may be facilitated not only by the level, but also by the content of parental involvement.

4. Paranoid personality type

Lack of sense of humor

Egocentricity (obsession with oneself, everything that happens has something to do with them)

A sense of grandiosity (but hence the feeling of guilt: If I am omnipotent, then all unpleasant things mean my failure).

A complex and painful problem for many paranoid individuals is the combination of confusion about their sexual identity, craving for same-sex intimacy and related preoccupation with homosexuality.

Feeling of isolation and loneliness (no friends, and if they are friends, they are often “against someone”)

Not only do they struggle with anger, resentment, vindictiveness and other more hostile feelings, but in addition they suffer from overwhelming fear, shame, guilt and envy

They are extremely jealous and can constantly “test their partner” because they are afraid of betrayal and see it everywhere

There are bodily clamps

They don’t know how to rest and relax

There are always specific figures to whom their irritation is directed

An insatiable need to remake, punish, criticize others. Active in your claims

Paranoid individuals are capable of deep attachment and lasting fidelity.

Tendency to chemical dependencies.

Unlike antisocial (psychopathic) individuals, main threat for long-term attachment in a situation with a paranoid personality, it is not a lack of sensitivity to others, but rather the experience of betrayal

Prerequisites for the formation of a paranoid personality type:

Clinical practice suggests that a child who grew up paranoid suffered from severe damage to his sense of his own reality (power); more precisely, he was subjected to repeated suppression and humiliation.

The formation of a paranoid person is usually based on criticism, punishment depending on the whim of adults who cannot be satisfied, as well as extreme humiliation.

Another contribution to the paranoid personality organization is uncontrollable anxiety (non-paranoid) in the person who provided primary care for the child.

5. Depressive and manic personalities

The depressive personality type has something in common with the manic personality type. Symptoms and behavioral characteristics are determined only by temperament. Many people experience alternating periods of depression and mania; those whose condition corresponds to the psychotic level are usually described as having a "manic-depressive" illness ("bipolar").

The belief of such people that at their core they are bad and worry about their innate destructiveness

The fact that they have been rejected is transformed into an unconscious belief that they deserve rejection, it is their shortcomings that caused it, and future rejection will be inevitable once their partner gets to know them better.

Low activity and high fatigue

Persistent sadness, low energy, anhedonia (inability to enjoy normal pleasures)

autonomic disorders (problems with nutrition, sleep and self-regulation)

They direct their negative feelings not at another, but at themselves, hating themselves without any correlation with their current shortcomings.

They rarely experience feelings of anger and anger; instead they feel guilty.

Extremely high vulnerability, vulnerability to criticism

Consistency in relationships

They will acquit the offender and come to his defense.

Depression and the self-destructive patterns that analytically oriented practitioners classify as masochism are related in that both are adaptations to unconscious guilt. In fact, they coexist so often that many authors (eg, Kernberg, 1984) consider the “depressive-masochistic” personality to be one of the three standard neurotic-level character organizations. However, McWilliams makes the following differentiation: “masochistic people consider themselves to be suffering, but undeservedly, victims of persecution or simply born under an unlucky star, cursed through no fault of their own (for example, due to “bad karma”). Unlike those who have only a depressive basis and who at some level resign themselves to their unhappy fate because they believe they have earned it, masochistic individuals may protest like Shakespeare's lover crying out to the deaf heavens with his futile cries."

Leading defense mechanisms:

Introjection (unconscious internalization of the most hated qualities of old love objects. Their positive traits are remembered with gratitude, and their negative ones are experienced as part of oneself)

Self-turning (most often used to reduce separation/separation anxiety)

Psychological prerequisites for the formation of personality type:

Depression runs in families, but it is impossible to strictly assess the extent to which depressive tendencies are genetically transmitted and to what extent parental depressive behavior creates the basis for dysthymic reactions in their children. Characterological depression in parents - especially in the early years of child development.

The presence of early loss, not always obvious, but also internal, psychological.

A family atmosphere where there is a negative attitude towards crying (mourning). When parents or caregivers model denial of grief, or insist that the child subscribe to the family myth that he will be better off without the lost object, or force the child to affirm that he does not feel pain, the experience of grief becomes hidden. It goes deep and gradually takes the form of a belief that something is wrong in one’s own “I”.

The presence of separation/individuation difficulties in the mother herself, which provokes a feeling of guilt for separation and her own individualization in the child. Thus, the depressed person begins to experience his natural desire for separation as hateful. A significant loss during the separation-individuation phase virtually guarantees some depressive dynamics.

Labeling by family members as “too sensitive”/“too emotional” (exploiting the emotional talent of a particular child), which the child continued to carry internally and which became part of his feelings of inferiority.

Freud was the first to compare and contrast depressive (“melancholic”) states with the normal experience of grief. He discovered an important difference between the two states: in normal grief reactions the external world is experienced as diminished in some important way (loss significant personality), while in depressive states what is experienced as lost or destroyed is part of oneself. Therefore, in some ways, depression is the opposite of grief. People who go through the grief process in a normal way do not become depressed, even though they grieve deeply for a period of time after a bereavement or loss.

Manic personality type

Mania is back side depression. People endowed with a hypomanic personality have a depressive organization, which is neutralized through the defense mechanism of denial.

The individual is cheerful, highly social, prone to idealizing others, dependent on work, tends to flirt in behavior, and at the same time he secretly feels guilty in connection with aggression towards others. He is incapable of being alone, has limitations in empathy and love, and is not systematic enough in his own cognitive style

High rate of speech and gestures

High speed of internal processes

High attention span

Low fatigue: little sleep, little rest

High communication skills and social activity

Constant mobility (indicates a high level of anxiety)

It seems that they are constantly on top - until suddenly exhaustion sets in (the transition to a depressive state).

The self-esteem of people with a manic structure can be maintained through a combination of successful pain avoidance, elation, and charming others.

Can't stand loneliness

Poor sense of accumulation of bodily needs.

Leading defense mechanisms:

Denial (manifested in their tendency to ignore (or transform into humor) events that upset and disturb most other people)

Reaction (manifests in the form of flight)

Psychological prerequisites for the formation of a manic personality type:

The personal histories of manic people, perhaps even more often than those of depressives, reveal patterns of repeated traumatic separations without any opportunity for the child to relive the experience. The death of significant people, divorces and separations, sudden changes of place of residence that were not experienced and mourned are characteristic of the childhood of manic individuals.

6. Masochistic (self-destructive) personality type

Like the other phenomena described above, moral-masochistic behavior is not necessarily pathological, even if it is self-denial in the broad sense of the word. Sometimes morality dictates that we suffer for the sake of something more worthwhile than our short-term individual comfort. Masochism comes in varying degrees and has different shades.

Feeling unworthy, guilty, rejected, deserving of punishment

They appear to others as pretentious and contemptuous, exalted in their suffering and contemptuous of mere mortals who cannot bear such great grief with such grace.

Complains openly (verbally and nonverbally)

They are in the position of a victim (they are looking for a savior and see the “persecutor”, the guilty one)

They receive hidden (unconscious) pleasure from their suffering (suffering has value). -

The pity of others as a value.

Unlike depressed people, they see “evil” not so much within themselves, but outside (in this they may be similar to the paranoid type)

Three main areas of suffering:

1) Health: They love to get sick, they don’t get treatment, but they actually ruin it.

2) Marriage: choose despot partners. As a rule, psychopaths.

3) Own children: They sacrifice all of themselves for the sake and in the name of their children

Leading defense mechanisms:

Reacting externally (harming oneself)

Several dimensions of masochistic response (Reik, 1941): (1) provocation (as in the previous case); (2) appeasement (“I am already suffering, so please refrain from further punishment”); (3) exhibitionism (“Please note: I am in pain”); (4) avoidance of guilt (“Look what you made me do!”).

Psychological prerequisites for the formation of a masochistic type:

Typically, the story of masochistic individuals sounds similar to that of depressives: with large unmourned losses, critical or guilt-inducing caregivers, role reversals where children feel responsible for parents, incidents of trauma and abuse, and depressive patterns. However, if you are careful, you can also hear about people who were close to the patient when he was experiencing quite serious troubles. Where depressives feel that no one needs them, masochistic people feel that if they can express their need for sympathy and care, their emotional loneliness can end.

7. Obsessive-compulsive personality type

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (from Lat. obsessio - “siege”, “envelopment”, Lat. obsessio - “obsession with an idea” and Lat. compello - “I force”, Lat. compulsio - “coercion”) is a mental disorder that can have chronic, progressive or episodic.

The main value is in thought and cognitive processes, not feelings. Motto: “Don’t feel, but do”

Tendency to isolation (in extreme manifestations this is similar to schizoid)

Desire for control (unconscious fantasies of omnipotent control)

Cleanliness, neatness, punctuality

Tendency to conceal, closedness

Get tired quickly in a group

Recover only in solitude

Uncreative, prefer templates

Stable and predictable

They can be effective in performing formal, social roles– in contrast to their role in the intimate, domestic sphere. Even with loving attachments, they may be unable to express affection without experiencing anxiety and shame, and therefore often turn emotionally charged interactions into depressing cognitive ones.

Leading defense mechanisms:

Rationalization and intellectualization (in people with high intelligence)

Prerequisites for the formation of an obsessive-compulsive personality type:

Parents and caregivers of obsessive-compulsive individuals set high behavioral standards and expect their children to comply with them from an early age. They strive to be firm and persistent, rewarding good behavior and punishing misbehavior.

Parents are overly strict or begin to demand obedience from children too early, blame them not only for unacceptable behavior, but also for corresponding feelings, thoughts, fantasies, parents are overly strict or begin to demand obedience from children too early, blame them not only for unacceptable behavior, but also for corresponding feelings, thoughts, fantasies.

8. Hysterical personality type (theatrical personalities)

Extremely high emotionality (Sometimes they can become so addicted to worry that they move from one crisis to another).

High levels of anxiety, tension and reactivity – especially interpersonally

Often the desire to overcome anxiety with the help of an exciting love story or one's own disappearance

They communicate very differently with men and women. A woman in a homogeneous group tends to be friends, but if there is at least one man, she will compete with women; in a male group, she will force men to compete with each other. Sees men as strong and amazing and women as weak and insignificant.

Tendency to mysticism and superstition.

They are intuitive, have a diffuse boundary between reality and fiction.

Acute fear of aging

Despite the outwardly emphasized sexuality? may be asexual and often frigid

The main sense of self in hysteria is that of a small, fearful and defective child coping with difficulties as well as can be expected in a world dominated by powerful and alien others.

Leading defense mechanisms:

Prerequisites for the formation of a hysterical personality type:

The most common occurrence of hysteria among women is explained by two facts: 1) men in general have more power in society than women, and no child can fail to notice this; and 2) men are less directly involved in caring for babies, and this makes them more attractive, easily suitable for idealization by “others.”

Some little boys who grew up under a "matriarchy" where their affiliation male has been denigrated (sometimes with contemptuous opposition to hypothetical “real men”), develop in a hysterical direction, despite the advantage traditionally given to men in general.

In general, neurotics have a bad reputation. I wouldn’t be surprised if you take my word for it without questioning this statement in the slightest. Adjectives applicable to these people, anyone will be forced to frown for no apparent reason.

See for yourself. Neurotics are:

excited,
tense (or “tense”, as it is now fashionable to say),
mood people.

Don’t feed them bread - just let them fixate on something, and then hold on: before your eyes, actions on an unprecedented scale will unfold, comparable to a special operation to save the Earth from space invaders. Remember, for neurotics nothing happens for nothing.

Whatever definitions you turn to, everyone makes it clear: being neurotic is not good. In general, purely logically, the fears are quite understandable. After all, according to research from the US National Center for Biotechnology Information, such unstable (this is the main characteristic of most definitions known to the world related to the topic) behavior can pose a threat to human health.

Nevertheless, not all scientific minds are inclined to interpret this phenomenon purely negatively. People who are able to cope with their neurasthenia without much effort and tangible losses can derive many advantages from this disorder, unlike the rest of the mortals, for whom everything is “normal”.

As promised, let's understand the terms, because in this case it is fundamental. So, let’s compare the differences between neurosis and neuroticism.

3. Being neurotic is not only harmful, but also useful.

A high level of responsibility, combined with a tendency towards neurasthenia, gives its owner several pleasant bonuses. Here's what Dr. Nicholas Turiano, a research fellow in the Department of Psychology at the University of Rochester, thinks about it:

People prone to neurasthenia are usually susceptible to increased anxiety and emotional reactivity. However, it is not at all necessary that these factors will lead to negative consequences, for example, high blood pressure or hormonal imbalance. Excessive conscientiousness allows neurotics to protect themselves from harmful reactions of the body: of course, this will not relieve them of all worries, but it will force them to pay special attention to their health.

4. Experiences are good for neurotics

The tendency to worry about or without reason is not the best trait of human character, however, “healthy neurasthenics” can make it work for themselves. “Simply put,” explains Dr. Turiano, “anxiety is an additional source of motivation to cope with the very thing that causes anxiety.”

5. Neurotics calm down around their loved ones.

It is believed that those who are subject to stress calm down when they are close to loved ones and people close to them. And this is not at all accidental. According to recent studies, tender romantic relationships between partners have a calming effect on individuals prone to bouts of neurasthenia.

6. Every decision of a neurotic is fateful.

Accept next position as a given and keep in mind: regardless of the complexity of the choice facing a neurotic, it will be difficult decision. Cheesecake or Viennese waffles for dessert? Should I work in the old team or take advantage of the offer of a new potential employer? Doesn't matter. There are no small things in life, and everything has its consequences.

7. Neurotic conditions can increase the speed of the thought process

So says a group of researchers from Downstate Medical Center at the State University of New York. Scientists conducted a small experiment and found that people overwhelmed by doubts and fears are, in some cases, able to show higher results in IQ tests than those who are less susceptible to anxiety.

The point here is that neurotics tend to adapt to life better, because they try to avoid ambiguous situations. And they are constantly busy with this, which loads their brain with additional tasks and makes them think faster.

However, this opinion still seemed controversial to us. After all, there are a lot of people who are simply lost when they find themselves in a stressful situation.

8. Thinking does not change your mind

When talking about neurotics, you can safely use the words of the classics. The grief of neurotics comes from the mind. These people are constantly thinking about something, subjecting every thought or event to careful analysis. This irritates many people, and as a result the phrase is heard: “You take on too much.” It's a shame, the person just wanted to help.

9. On the inevitability of a sad ending

People susceptible to neurotic behavior are convinced that the glass is always half empty. During my student years, I went on an exchange trip to the USA, where, based on my musical passions, I met Danny, a boy my age who lived next door. He was a thoughtful and suspicious person, which, however, did not prevent him from being an excellent friend and interlocutor. In short, he was a classic neurotic.

So, his favorite saying was: “That would be nothing my friend” (“Nothing will come of it, my friend”). This phrase was always pronounced somewhat theatrically and sounded so doomed that one day I asked him again: “Nothing, really? Why so Danny?” (“Really nothing? Why, Danny?”). I immediately really liked Danny’s answer: “C’mon man... If it would be nothing, you won’t be disappointed.” (“Come on, buddy... If nothing works out, you won’t be disappointed”).

What a very convenient approach to fate and all its unexpected turns!

According to an article published in the journal American Psychologist, neurotic people tend to express negative emotions in response to a threat, a hopeless situation, or a serious loss. But despite the obvious unproductiveness of such behavior in a difficult situation, a little pessimism can be useful: life is still complex and unfair, so we need to approach it more realistically.

10. Everything that doesn't kill...

...makes us stronger. This is also true for the heroes of my today’s publication. Neurotics are hypersensitive to their own thoughts, words and actions. Their self-absorption is so strong that it can even be useful both personally and professionally, if you don’t get too carried away with soul-searching.

To summarize, I want to say the following: each personality type has its own strengths and weak sides, which are definitely worth taking into account. Neurotics are distinguished by one thing: they know themselves as flaky, because they are busy with self-awareness almost constantly, in the background (this allows them to be in a kind of tone).

It turns out that being neurotic isn't so bad! As they say, forewarned is forearmed.

Who is neurotic symptoms. These people are afraid

Who is a neurotic?

Symptoms of a neurotic

Neurotic Love

Bottom line

Who is this neurotic?

Signs of a neurotic

Neurotic woman

Neurotic man

Neurotics and psychotics - differences

How to deal with a neurotic person?

How to help a neurotic?

How to live as a neurotic?

How to stop being neurotic?

How not to raise a neurotic?

Books for neurotics

Are neurasthenic and neurotic the same thing?

Neurosis and neurotic personality

Subordinate type of neurotic personality or the “movement towards people” attitude

Aggressive, “movement against people” attitude

“Movement from the people” and the tendency towards isolation

Who is a neurotic and how to stop being neurotic?

Who is this neurotic?

Signs of a neurotic

Neurotic woman

Neurotic man

Neurotics and psychotics - differences

How to deal with a neurotic person?

How to help a neurotic?

How to live as a neurotic?

How to stop being neurotic?

How not to raise a neurotic?

Books for neurotics

Positive and negative sides of neurotics

Neurotics - who are they?

How they become

Main symptoms

Basic conditions

Neurosis

Neuroticism

Positive traits

Attitude towards love

Problems at work

Rules of communication

Defensive reactions

Childhood neurosis

What to do and how to treat

When to ask for help

Conclusion

Neurotics, psychotics: from normal to pathological

3. Being neurotic is not only harmful, but also useful.

4. Experiences are good for neurotics

5. Neurotics calm down around their loved ones.

6. Every decision of a neurotic is fateful.

7. Neurotic conditions can increase the speed of the thought process

8. Thinking does not change your mind

9. On the inevitability of a sad ending

10. Everything that doesn't kill...

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